Be Your Own Guru

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There’s a term out there that applies to newbies.  It’s called “Paralysis of Analysis”.  When I first started I definitely fell into this trap.  I’d read everything there is to read, and post every place I could find, but rarely go out and do any field work.  Now I find it irritating to force myself  to sit at my computer and post anywhere, since it takes time away from the time that could be spent in the field, developing social circles, or school and other life building goals.

Many new guys fall into this trap yet many find there way out again and begin going out in the field as I did.  There seems to actually be a natural correlation.  Those who stay in the community for 3 months will keep it going and those who stay for 5 months usually have begun really learning from the field.  This post isn’t for the new guys though, (sorry I’ll make one for you guys later on), this post is for those intermediate guys.  The guy’s who have taken the game seriously and have gone out again and again into the field and still have yet to begin seeing the results that they’ve been waiting for.  This post is for every guy who has asked the following question…

“What do I need to do to make that change and get myself to the next level?”

The answer? Become Your Own Guru Read more

Premature EJECT-ulation

Today I thought I’d share with you guys something I know is still plaguing a lot of the guys in the community.

The question to ask yourself is… Are you a victim of Premature Ejectulation?

What I am referring to is leaving a set prematurely because you “feel” you have been blown out.

I have witnessed a wide range of students now some of them pretty well known amongst the community who will quite happily open a set, get them hooked, and run a decent number of routines generating a great deal of IOI’s and then eject, actually saying goodbye.

A key point here is that this should not be confused with capture – recapture. Whereby you leave the set on a high note at the beginning of the night, with a time bridge stating you will probably see them around later on, and maybe they owe you a dance/drink whatever. Just so they don’t feel trapped by you early on in the night.

I am talking about having a set hooked late into the evening, and leaving the set for a number of reasons which may seem valid in your head at the time, however upon further inspection you can see that it would have made more sense to stay in set.

The common reasons I have heard are as follows: Read more

“The Forbidden Truth” by Brad P.

The intention of this report is to give a snapshot of the current state of dating science, and to make a few simple recommendations on how to improve the experiences of those who wish to become proficient in dating and seduction.

I expect some of this may be controversial at first, but I hope some of these recommendations will become standard practice in the future. I believe I have a unique vantage point on the matter, and that this report will help many men have more success with women. Read more

A Man Is Measured By The Company He Keeps

Now the first question that must come to your mind while reading this is “Who the hell is Psych and why in the world is this guy posting here?!” The answer?…Thundercat REALLY goofed by choosing me.  So now you’re all stuck with me and will just have to deal.

Here’s what people are saying about me though….

“Psych is pretty good. I’ve seen him in field and know that a lot of people would benefit from his writings.”-White Rabbit

“i think psych would be pretty good. his theory is on-point.”-Elev8

“Psych. He pulls lesbians.”-Compey

“Psych’s gonna blow up in the scene hardcore, i saw this youtube video of him pulling some chick on stilts!”-Millionflame

“PSYCH! One time he got pulled over by a female cop… and he fucked his way out of the ticket!”-Hellmach

“Psych has blue hair. I will work with him any day : )”-Heartwork

“I once heard that Psych opened a hot ass MILF at starbucks by singing “I’M BRINGIN SEXY BACK!” the whole song! He ended up making hot love to her 30 secs later.”-Flame

“I heard Psych amog’d a bear out of eating him and the bear ended up buying him a drink and offering him some raw salmon”-Bill Brasky

But who am I really?  I got into this game about 2 1/2 years back by reading a book I’m sure many are familiar with.  It was actually shown to me by my girlfriend at the time, worst mistake of her life!  Now even though I had a girlfriend I was by no means a “natural”.  I’d spend almost every weekend playing Magic the Gathering…by myself.  I also of course have my sob stories when it comes to women as I’m sure every community guy does.  However that was the past and since then I’ve made my transformation and worked tirelessly on improving myself with women and learning the skill, art, and science of what we all call “Game”.  Since my journey I surrounded myself with like minded individuals to aid me in reaching my full potential, which is really what this article is all about and what I’ll get into now.  You can find more of me by checking out youtube. Read more

LOGISTICS – Planning The Lay

(Get more from AFCAdam at AttractionExplained.com)

In the past few months I’ve been so busy writing articles for other companies and people that I rarely get the time to write about any of my own thoughts and ideas. I’ve always been a massive fan of the game, as I’m sure many of you out there are. The thing I’ve personally always enjoyed the most about it however, is Innovating.

When I was first discovered by the community as a whole it was based on the fact that a lot of my concepts were actually different from a lot of the current stuff out there, and they where also backed up by as many psychological studies as I could possibly find to support my arguments. Since then a lot of my ideas have been built upon and developed by the community. Over the years I’m glad to see they’re actively being used by people all across the world. Something I would never have dared dream was actually possible.

Despite all the work I’ve been doing I still haven’t stopped developing new ideas and  theories and researching into the practical explanations and studies to support these ideas.

I’ve never been one to keep my work to myself and then sell them in some high priced product, I much prefer to get them down on paper and share them with the people who will actually use them, namely those reading this very article. I’m now actively taking the time to jot down some of my new theories and revisiting the old ones in a bunch of articles I plan on releasing on this site, after Thundercat kindly gave me permission to do so.

I’m hoping these will be topics little covered in the community to date. They will all be designed to be as explanatory as possible and to be practical things you can use straight away to get results asap. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy researching and writing them. So without further fluff here’s the first one and it’s all about logistics… Read more

How Ugly Men Attract Women

It’s a sad fact of life that everyone out there has some type of insecurity that makes them feel "unattractive."  Even the most  beautiful women in the world have stuff about them that makes them feel ugly at times.

For men – their visual nature can often times make them very critical of their own appearance.  There is always something that makes us  feel as though we are ugly.

Maybe it’s the fact that we are too short, or fat, or bald, or old?  There are any number of factors that make us feel "unworthy" of the attentions of beautiful women.

But if that was the case – no one would ever be able to attract a woman at all!

In fact, the next time you’re out, take a mental note of every guy you see with an attractive girl, and try and appraise whether or not you think that guy’s looks are worthy of the girl he’s with.

Sure, sometimes you’ll find a guy who’s with a girl and they are both fine credits to their species.  But most of the time, what you’ll find is the guys with really hot and appealing women range from "average" to "ugly" in the looks department.

That’s because beauty – in men – is the exception, not the standard.

But more than that, men rely on factors OTHER than their looks to help attract the kinds of women they want to them.

There are three major factors that most men try and utilize to the best of their ability when attracting new and exciting women to them.  They are:

1.  Wealth

2.  Social Status

3.  Personality

Let’s go through these one at a time…

The first factor men use to attract the opposite sex is their wealth, or finances.  Proving one’s "provider" status to women is a sure fire  way to get female attention.  After all, what woman DOESN’T want to be pampered?

However, there is a big problem with this tactic.  First of all, not everyone is rich or wealthy, so this factor is reserved for the few that are.  More than that, women often feel like you’re trying to "bribe" or "impress" them with your wealth, and because of that, they will treat you more like an ATM machine with feet, rather than a loving, caring, mate.

Keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with using financial success to draw women into you.  But unless you have the money in the bank to do so, you can’t rely on this method to get you a good woman.

The second factor is social status.  Women are very attuned to the social hierarchy of things, so having a "high status" around women definitely makes any man more attractive.

This status comes from holding a certain position of power.  It could be an important job, some type of fame, or just the esteem of your peers.

However, one of the difficulties with this is that you need to be able to display social status.  You can’t just tell someone "I’m a very important person" and have them believe it.  They have to get a sense of it themselves, and sometimes your situation is not conducive to communicating this (like meeting a woman on the street for instance.  She has no idea who you are!).

Also – not everyone has a high social status.  Some people are content with maintaining a medium to low level status.  Where does that leave these people?

With the THIRD factor – that of Personality.  The thing I like about personality is that it’s something EVERYONE can use to attract the kind of women they desire, and it doesn’t matter how much money you make or what your social situation is like.

Having an attractive personality is the best way for "average" or "unattractive" men to get women interested in them.  Being able to make a woman laugh will turn her on more than a guy with big muscles and a full head of hair.

Understand that women are slaves to their emotions, and your personality is the method by which you trigger emotions inside a woman!

The better your personality, the better you’re able to make a woman feel.

And your personality is something that can be changed and cultivated over time.  You can make yourself into anything you want to be!  It’s  truly amazing how some "losers" can become "rockstars" in the eyes of their friends and the women they like just by tweaking their personality a little bit.

So how do you do this?

The first step is to really work on your confidence. The more confident you are, the better you’re able to display your personality.

Working on your social skills will also help you to be relaxed and have fun around women.  This will create new opportunities for attraction.

And learning how to create strong emotional bonds is also the best way there is to get a woman emotionally attached to you.

When you use these three techniques, you’ll be able to gain the fancy of any woman you wish – no matter WHAT you look like.

Stop Playing Games With Women

Got a new article from Carlos Xuma about how to get out of all the "games" women play with guys.  Check it out.

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Understanding What Routines Are

My buddy Cameron Teone wrote a really good article about understanding what routines are, and how you should use them in pickup.

Check it out…

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Overcoming Shyness

Here is a FACT:

About 5.5% of the male population in America never marries.

Of this group, about 50% of these men are homosexuals.

Then, half of the group of men that remains are composed entirely of men who, for a variety of personal reasons, have chosen on a voluntary basis not to marry.

Guess what that means?

It means that 1.5% of all American Males have not voluntarily chosen to remain single and never married – but remain that way because the are SEVERELY shy.

Do you know what that means?

It means that about 1.7 MILLION men, currently residing in the United States, will never marry OR experience any form of intimate sexual contact with a woman…

All due to their SHYNESS.

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Meeting Older Women

Let’s face it, some things just get better with age.  Things like fine wine, Cuban cigars, and yes, even women!

Meeting a woman who’s older than you can actually be quite a good way to meet a fantastic partner.  Usually, older women are much more experienced, not only in relationships, but also in the bedroom.

So meeting older women can actually teach you a ting or two – not only about relationships, but also about what you’re really looking for in a partner.

So the real question is:

Are you interested in dating a woman who’s older than you are?

Do you find older women more attractive than their younger counterparts?

Well, my friend, you are not alone!

Older women are much more "mature" and experienced in the ways of love. They’ve usually had a lot of practice dealing with men, and know their way around the bedroom.

They can also be MUCH easier to deal with than younger women, who can tend to be a little "high maintenance."

If you’re a man in your mid-to-late 20s who’s mostly been with women in their late teens and early 20s, dating a woman in her 40s can be a real treat for you!

They tend to be more mature and less selfish – sexually, and in just about every other way – than the women you’re used to dating. And if you’re not looking for anything serious, the chances are higher that they’re not either, if they’re just past child-bearing age.

In that way, they’re kind of like a lot of women in their mid-20s and younger, who don’t feel compelled to start a family in the way that single women who’ve hit 28 or 29 do. By the time a single woman reaches that age range, she’s more likely to feel that now’s the time to act if she’s ever going to have children.

That’s because she’s not getting any younger, and she feels less attractive than she was when she was in her early 20s. In her mind, it’s only going to get harder to find a great man she can settle down with.

(By the way, a lot of women at this stage make a mistake that a lot of men make their entire lives: they get desperate. Some women actually repel men because of their desire to get into a serious relationship sooner than the man is comfortable with. And a lot of women at this stage will settle for a man who they’re not compatible with, but who will end up fulfilling their need to have a family.)

So how can you start meeting older women?

Well, there are lots of options.  But first, I’d like to point out that if you’re looking to go to trendy nightclubs or bars, chances are, you won’t find any there.

Most older women will tend to frequent more low-key establishments.  Bars in classy hotels, for instance.  Or cocktail hours at certain restaurants which serve alcohol.

Many of the best places to meet older women are places you’d go during your daily errands.  Places like the grocery store, for instance, or the mall.  Anyplace women go to shop.  Coffee shops in the morning and afternoon are good venues as well, since many older women will stop there on their way to and from work.

But the best place to meet older women, in my opinion, is online.

Many older women have kids or jobs, which doesn’t leave them much time to socialize, so many of them will go online looking for dates.  Places like Match.com, eHarmony, and even MySpace are fantastic venues for meeting older women.

But there are problems with dating older women. You may not be as mature as she is, which can be a problem for both of you. And the age difference can become rather awkward should you decide to get married: If there’s a 15-year age difference between you, then she’ll be 50 when you’re 35!

But that’s not to say that you shouldn’t meet and date an older woman. It can be a great experience for you, if you’re aware of the potential issues that can arise in the relationship.

So whether you want to meet older women, younger women, or women your own age, you should take some time to sign up for my free Meet Women crash course.

In this free course, I give you some A-List solid tips, tactics, and techniques on how to meet women without fear of rejection – no matter what age they are.  In fact, I even tell you how to make it easy and fun!

You owe it to yourself to take this opportunity.  Because if you wait, you may miss out on the woman of your dreams.

You can get your free course here:

Click Here For Free How To Meet Women Course

It only takes a few seconds to sign up, and you get free instant access once you do.

I really wish I had such a resource available to me when I first started!  It would have saved me a lot of trouble!  So take advantage of it while you can.  I don’t know how long I’ll make it available for free.

Wishing you success,

Joseph Matthews
Author of The Art Of Approaching Women

Conquer & Pillage Your Social Circles

So Badboy just sent me a new article of his about how to use your social circle to get laid like a rockstar.  Unfortunately, he only sent me the first half of the article, so I’ll have to mark this as "Part I" until I get the rest of it.

Check it out…

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How To Date Women At Work

Someone over on the mASF forums had a question about dating women in the workplace, so I thought I’d open my big mouth and chime in about this subject.

I think every man out there is well aware of all the problems that go with picking women up at work.  As if sexual harrassment wasn’t enough, you now have "sexual intimidation" going on.  (Whatever the hell THAT means!)

Having worked in an office environment myself, I definitely know the plight of many men out there who work 40+ hours a week at their jobs.  So many guys spend so much time at work, and by the time they get home they’re too tired to go out or they need to get MORE work done, so it becomes a real issue of:  work is the only logical place to meet people.

That said, workplace romances aren’t uncommon.  Lots of couples meet through work.  The very fact that two people are working at the same place creates a commonality that can help build rapport and open an avenue to attraction.

Back when I was in an office, one of my office-mates was well known as the "Office Dater."  He’d basically only date women who worked at the company, and he was very good at it.  I’ll share the tips I learned from him to effectively date at the workplace…

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Picking Up Women

When you’re out picking up women, it’s important to remember some very simple rules that will make sure your chances of picking up women will actually WORK, rather than get a drink thrown in your face.

You can never really know when a pickup is going to go well, but there are ways you can prepare. So here’s some steps for success BEFORE you go out picking up women!

When you go to a place where you know there will be attractive women, make the decision that you’re actually going to pick them up!

Too often, guys will go out with no real goal in mind. And guess what? When you have no outcome in mind – you’ll usually end up with NOTHING.

But if you go out with a specific goal, your chances of achieving that goal go up DRAMATICALLY.

It doesn’t matter if it’s as simple as "Talk To One Woman Tonight," or as ambitious as "Get Two Women To Come Home For A Threesome."

As long as you have a goal, your chances of picking up a girl will increase substantially.

You don’t even have to be GOING OUT to pick up women. Maybe you’re visiting a food court in mid-afternoon because you’re feeling hungry, and you know you’ll spot at least one attractive woman there who you could see later.

You may or may not succeed in your quest, but you’re much more likely to have a positive outcome if you go with the mindset that you can pull off a successful pickup.

Always take a pen and paper, or at least your cell phone, wherever you go. You’ll need it for when you exchange numbers with women. Be sure to keep a condom with you, too, just in case! Knowing that you have protection on hand is just one more thing that will keep you from chickening out.

Remember: Do Not Give Yourself An Excuse NOT To Pick Up Women!

The more excuses you make for yourself, the more likely you are to experience FAILURE.

And that hasn’t been working out for you too well, has it?

I can guarantee you, that the only way to 100% fail with women is to NOT MEET THEM.

Understand:  Picking up women is a mental game.  It’s about overcoming your fears and insecurities and having the courage to go after the woman you desire.

That is why you must FOCUS on your mindset.

Think positively.  Visualize a favorable outcome instead of failure.  Try feeling excited about talking to a girl instead of nervous.  Smile.  Make it a game.  Have fun, and the girl you’re talking to will have fun too.

Know your environment. When you meet a girl you like, you’ll want to get together with her soon – preferably the same day, while her attraction for you is still high. Be aware of good places nearby where you can "bounce" to, like bars, coffee houses, lounges, art galleries, or other fun place where you and your "target" can have a change of scenery.

You’ll want to go to a place that’s low-key enough so you can get to know each other better. When you bounce from one location to another, it’s like you’re going on another date. Why wait for another week to pass by to take her on another date so you can build comfort with her, when you know you can do it on the same day?

Have a place in mind where you can become intimate with her. If you live nearby and you can bring her home, so much the better.

Have an excuse to take her home that has nothing to do with sex. You can have a DVD that she’s never seen but has to see, or an exotic drink she’s never tried, or some photos you’ve taken of a place where you’ve been that she’s never seen. Or you can play her a song that you’ve written. It doesn’t matter, as long as it makes her comfortable enough to come over!

Honestly, I could go on and on about the subject of picking up women.  It is, after all, a hobby of mine, as I’m sure it is of yours.

But the fact of the matter is, this is an EXTENSIVE subject!  And it’s much too in-depth to cover here.

That’s why I would highly recommend checking out my free "How To Meet Women" Crash Course.

By signing up, you’ll instantly get tons of my best tactics on how to meet, date, attract, and pick up women sent directly to the privacy of your own email.

Just visit my website for free instant access.  In just a few short minutes, you’ll be getting the best tips on picking up women you’ve ever read – guaranteed.

Click Here For Your Free Meet Women Crash Course!

Wishing you success,

Joseph Matthews

Pick Up 101 All The Rage…

There’s a pretty big write-up on the Pick-Up 101 guys in the latest San Francisco Magazine.  The reporter really seemed to enjoy the workshop.

its funny, because Pick-Up 101 doesn’t really get as much press as a company like Mystery Method does, but I have yet to hear a single bad thing about their workshops.  In fact, many people who take them seem to have very positive experiences close to what the reporter in the article shares (unlike some workshops which shall remain nameless, you know, the ones that start with an R and end with a D).

Those San Fran boys really seem to be kicking some ass up there.  Check it out for yourself…

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Regaining The Frame

SteviePUA has a great article here about how to regain your frame when someone messes it up for you.

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