Ideagasms Melt-Down: Stephane’s Lies Revealed

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So if you’re a follower of the blog, you’ll know that I’ve been critical of Stephane over at Ideagasms since, oh, it began.  I’ve just had ay too many people I like and trust tell me about how the guy lied and screwed them over to actually believe Stephane is in this business to actually help other people as opposed to creating a cult for himself.

In one of my early podcasts, you can see where I expose most of his lies during an interview with Barry Kirkey.  (Its not one of my better podcasts, but whatever.  The point is to get the truth out there.)

Anyway, today I get an email from a reader named Lor who informs me of some major drama going on over at Ideagasms.  It seems more and more of the cult has stopped drinking the kool-aid, and Stephane is banning them to keep them from speaking out against his teachings.

But these “Ex-IGs” aren’t staying quiet.  In fact, they’ve created their own forum and Facebook Group to expose the truth about Stephane, and boy, is it not pretty!

Check out what David B., the creator of the Facebook Group, has to say about his experiences with Stephane… Read more

The Ellyn Drama Continues…

**Reposted from the first Lair, original date: 12/20/03

First off, before I get to the latest developments, I’d like to thank everyone who posted a reply on the “Dear Lord, What Have I Done?” thread concerning Ellyn, the overweight, brain-damaged, diseased ex-cokehead stripper who wants to ride my rodney with her wart-infested poon.  I got into DC today, and my mind couldn’t help but wonder about her.  As bad as I make the poor girl sound, she isn’t really all that nasty.  In fact, she does have a sweet side, and she’s had a tough life to top it off.  Of course, that’s no excuse for her current state, but I can’t help but feel more than a little sorry for her.

Especially after I get this email today:

Subject Name:  Hey Sexy

hey there you.  i am so excited to hear that you are coming to this side of the country.  i have missed seeing you and talking to you.  i know that you will only be in for two weeks and you stated that you will honor with a visit… that’s awesome!!!!  i was looking at the calendar trying to decide what would be a good day for you to come up and hoping that the same day would be alright for you aswell.  i came up with saturday the 27th into the 28th or sunday the 28th into the 29th.  or if you wanted to come sooner that would be alright too.  i am going to go ahead and give you the directions that you will need to get here:

She then proceeds to give me the most detailed directions I’ve ever gotten from anyone in my life all littered with enough cute-ass smiley-faces to make you sick.

I like how I told her I *MIGHT* visit her while I’m out, and she’s already taking the frame that its a done deal.  Ellyn was always very good at taking a strong frame, its one of the things that makes her so volitile — usually because the frames she too were exactly the opposite of what others wanted (a clear drama queen tactic).  I’m wondering if it is possible to see her again and avoid the sex.  I mean, for all I know she could have gone from a somewhat cute girl into a complete warpig.

Regardless, this is a girl who does not have much happiness in her life, and it would mean a lot to her for me to go out and see her.  I’m conflicted as to what to do.  I still hold a place in my heart for this girl, more from pity than anything else.  Its sort-of the same situation I’m struggling with in the “Power of the Dark Side” post.  I honestly don’t know if I’m going to see her or not.

I’ll keep you updated.

Thundercat

Drama and the Women Who Love It

**Reposted from the first Lair, original date: 12/17/03

Okay, so a conversation I had dealing with open loops opened up into a conversation about women’s need for drama. In part, this is because I feel open loops create a tension that most women crave, because they are emotional crackheads. They feed off emotion, and the strongest forms of emotion are the bad ones. So Budec from the SS list asked me to expound further on this thought. So I’m reposting this here for your viewing pleasure:

Well, you have to understand that to most women, being on a hellish emotional rollercoaster is equivalent to being content and happy.

The thing is, us men are logical creatures.  We naturally think “Well, we have no drama in our lives, so this is good.  I can sit down, watch a football game, and be content.  There are no problems to deal with.”  That is our logic talking, because as men, if we see a problem, be it a practical or emotional one, we naturally — LOGICALLY — look to fix it.

Women, on the other hand, are emotional.  The absence of drama means the absence of emotion.  Without it, they get bored and are NOT content.  So when they have no drama in their lives they seek to create it.  In their minds, they think “Well, I have drama in my life, so this is good.  I can call up my best friend and we have something to talk about for two hours. And then, I can call up my boyfriend and because of the information I got from my best friend, we have something to argue about for four hours.  Then I can call all my other friends and talk about what I argued about for the next three days…”

The thing about emotions is that they are a high.  Be they good emotions or troublesome ones, they can be addictive.  This is why make-up sex is often so revered, because it is the ultimate emotional release after the culmination of a very charged rollercoaster of feelings.

Women often NEED this type of thing to feel happy, to stay interested, etc.  A lot of guys I know who are in happy long term relationships often create drama for the women they are with.  It works out for both parties because the women get the emotions they crave and stay interested but the men, at the same time, are in control of the situation because they are aware of what they are doing.

When you boil all this seduction and pick-up stuff down to its core, all you are really left with is the manipulation of emotion.  That’s all this is.  Once you are conscious of this, women become less of a mystery, because you realize that by charging these emotions, giving them the highs they desire (and then taking those highs away), gives you the power and makes you the one they pursue.

If you look at what women do to men to get US so turned-around, its all a series of emotional highs and lows that they instinctively do, and it sucks us in just as it sucks in other women.  The only difference is that we as men do not know how to handle this tactic because we are so logical.  To us, once a solution is offered, the problems should be fixed.  But to women, the solution isn’t fixing the problem, rather, its creating a new problem that nullifies the old one.

Often times, when I’m talking to a woman or a female friend, they’ll start rambling on and on about stupid problems and drama that occur in their daily lives. Things about how men are ass holes, or what this girl said about her behind her back, etc.  I’ve learned that when I would talk to them about these things from an emotional standpoint, like saying shit such as “Oh man, how does that make you feel?” as opposed to offering a solution to their problems, they respond so much better.  In fact, if you want to get really evil, you can even create more drama by antagonizing them about their stances on these dramatic issues in their lives and get them all riled up.

Either way, my point is that emotion is the building block of attraction, and the negative emotions are much more powerful and attention grabbing *initially* than the positive emotions.  When you use these in tandem, the positive emotions are much more powerful and noticeable.  This is what girls crave.  This is why they want drama.  And this is how expert seducers play the game.

Well, at least that’s how I play it.

Thundercat