Toxic Personalities in Dating: The Taker

August 10, 2010 by  
Filed under Analysis, Articles

Cameron has a pretty cool post up on his blog about a certain “Toxic Personality” type you should learn to spot and avoid if possible.

TheOne writes:

Continuing in this series of toxic personality traits, we come to the examine the value taker. This is a trait exhibited by individuals who have a great propensity towards self-absorption and a lack of willingness to want to contribute.

To compound the above mentioned issues, these individuals also may display a bewildering sense of entitlement. I’ll explain that a bit later.

Like the complainer, the value-taker can become just as easy to spot, if you learn to know what to look for. To start identifying this trait, you just have to be aware of super basic tell-tale signs that give them away.

The most noticeable trait that is rather self evident is their complete disregard towards other people’s lives. You’ll quickly note their tendency to not ask any questions about you. When they do, it’s related to what they can siphon off for themselves. It’s not about showing any actual interest in you.

So let’s assume you’re at a party, and you run to such types. They’ll come into basic general varieties.

Type 1 : The Proverbial Gold-Digger who will dig for information: What do you drive? Do you own or rent? What kind of a job? They may not ask explicitly and blatantly, but they’ll try to investigate to discover this info.

Type II: Talk about themselves constantly. Sometimes it’s the gold digger trying to impress you. Having established you’re someone of value, she is going to want to make a good impression. The most fascinating part this is that her own gold-digging prowess is limited by her lack of social skills.

It’ll sound like this: “Oh, I just moved her from Chicago, ya know I just love Chicago, but I moved out here, then when I got here, blah, blah, blah,… (2 min later) then 3 weeks later when I was on this job, I heard that…. Blah, blah, blah…”

Their story is not anecdotal, nor does it have a point. It’s not meant to entertain you, (because that’d be actually contributing something to the interaction), nor is it in the spirit of sharing and establishing rapport between two individuals.

It’s just a person talking. It’s not whimsical, insightful, educational, anecdotal, humorous, or entertaining. Just random words thrown in the air that follow enough of a format where they seem to make somewhat coherent sentences in the English language. (or a foreign language for that matter.)

To go a step deeper, individuals with this toxic personality trait often display a sense of entitlement. For some reason, unbeknownst to the rest of humanity, these people feel that they’re entitled to certain things. For this reason, they’re the worst to deal with in any sort of relationship, be it friendships, business, or romantic.

You could easily gather a handful of various businessmen in a variety of industries and they could easily tell you the common behavioral patterns amongst problem customers who suffer from a sense of entitlement.

Let’s say you had some sort of a consulting service, and you’re one of the best at what you do. Your rates for services rendered are an even $100 per hour.

A healthy person would enjoy your services, thank you for a job well done, and refer many clients towards word of mouth.

A toxic “Entitled” person would stay a half hour over time squeezing more of your services and time, (now up to 90 minutes instead of 60), and then at the end of all that, try to negotiate to pay less than the usual 100-Dollar rate.

Worst case scenario: He wasted an extra half hour of your time, paid you less than your current rates, and then may still want a refund 3 weeks later. I have no respect for these types of people. They pull douchebag moves that are driven by their self-absorption and sense of entitlement.

As usual, this is not specific to gender. Both men and women can possess this toxic trait.

What you can do about it: Get the f*** away from such people.

Sometimes, just the questions they ask you reveal enough insight that enables you to distinguish the toxicity within their personalities. In business, it’s the difference between, “Wow, your rates are too steep man” versus “I can’t afford all of that right now. Is there something else I can do or offer to make up for it?”

The latter person wants to contribute. This in fact reminds me of a friend of mine who is a fantastic kickboxer. He charges a good rate for his hourly services, but then, every so often I’d find random dudes helping him in various endeavor.

Upon being asked regarding a guy helping him build a fence in his backyard, he responded, “Oh, that’s ‘John’. He can’t afford to pay me so I told him I’d teach him and he could help me build that fence.”

I told him it sounded like the Karate Kid movie all over again! He laughed and agreed.

The point is, “John” was willing to contribute but the dude simply couldn’t afford to pay the cash required. Was building a fence exact compensation? Nope, but it was enough of an effort that was worthy.

Will everyone be willing to do what my kickboxing teacher friend did? No, but you’ll find enough people who will help you if you are willing to CONTRIBUTE in whatever way you can.

The article is pretty good.  I suggest you check out the full thing here.  I guess its part of a series of people with “Toxic Personalities.”  It can be hard to spot people who are “takers” sometimes because a skilled one will fool you into thinking they’re nice and cool, and you don’t realize they’re a complete douche until they’ve successfully screwed you over.

I’ve found the best way to deal with “Takers” is to have immense self respect.  The more confident you are in yourself, the more you respect your own time and contributions to others, the harder it is for people to take advantage of you.

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  12. JustinMow says:

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  13. Казино В сети: Твой Гид в Свет Азартных Развлечений

    Что такое сетевое казино и как выбрать безопасное?
    Азартное заведение в сети – является виртуальные платформы, предлагающие обширный спектр азартных игр: с традиционных игровых слотов и игровых автоматов до увлекательных карточных игр, таких колесо фортуны, блэкджек и покер. Однако, чтобы получить наибольшее удовольствие из развлечения, необходимо подобрать безопасное азартное заведение, что гарантирует справедливость и защищенность.
    Основные параметры подбора:
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    Оценка и комментарии: Изучите оценку казино и отзывы про казино со стороны других игроков. Данное поспособствует тебе подобрать проверенное заведение.
    Бонусы и спецпредложения: Казино с поощрениями предоставляют заманчивые варианты ради новых и регулярных игроков. Обратите внимание на бездепозитные бонусы, халявные вращения и иные акции.
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    Снятие денег: Позаботьтесь, чтобы азартное заведение с выводом средств предлагает комфортные и оперативные варианты получения выигрыша.
    Поддержка: Безопасные азартные заведения предоставляют хорошую помощь на русском языке для игроков со России.
    Защита: Безопасные казино защищают твои данные с помощью новых технологий шифрования.
    ?? Бонусы и акции в онлайн азартном заведении
    Онлайн азартные заведения заманивают новых пользователей обильными бонусами казино. При выборе места, уделите внимание на:
    Приветственный бонус: Вступительный поощрение при регистрацию – превосходная шанс начать игру с дополнительными средствами.
    Бесплатный бонус: Бесплатные бонусы позволяют играть в азартном заведении даром, без кладя средства.
    Бесплатные вращения: Бесплатные вращения или бесплатные вращения – возможность поиграть в игровые автоматы даром.
    Коды по акции: Промокоды азартного заведения предоставляют дополнительные поощрения и привилегии.
    Кэшбэк: Возврат казино возвращает долю проигранных денег.
    Спецпредложения азартного заведения: Принимайте участие в постоянных акциях и принимайте резервные поощрения.
    Многообразие игр в сетевом азартном заведении
    В онлайн азартном заведении вы обнаружите большой ассортимент азартных игр:
    Игровые автоматы: Азартные автоматы в сети или игровые автоматы – наиболее популярный вид игр.
    Колесо фортуны: Традиционная игра, что не лишается своей актуальности.
    Блэкджек: Интеллектуальная карточная развлечение, нуждающаяся планирования.
    Покер: Различные виды покера для поклонников карточных развлечений.
    Баккара, бинго, кено: Иные известные азартные развлечения.
    Live азартное заведение: Получайте удовольствие от игрой с реальными дилерами.
    Переносное казино: играйте в всяком месте
    Переносное казино – это комфортный способ получать удовольствие от азартом в всяком месте и в любое момент. Ты можете играть в любимые развлечения казино прямо со твоего смартфона или планшета.
    Куда запустить играть в сетевом азартном заведении?
    Дабы играть в казино и наслаждаться игры, Лучшее мобильное казино топ-лист 2025 года следуйте этим легким действиям:
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    Зарегистрируйтесь: Завершите скорую регистрацию в казино.
    Зачислите счет: Зачислите счет в азартном заведении удобным методом.
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    Как выиграть в азартном заведении и как снять средства?
    Игра в казино за деньги – является не лишь игра, но и шанс выиграть. Изучайте, улучшайте свои навыки и развлекайтесь ответственно. Казино с снятием обеспечивают скорый и удобный вывод средств из казино многообразными способами.

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  15. Внимание, участники!

    Готовы погрузиться в пространство интернет-казино и заработать настоящие деньги? Тогда вам сюда! Топ наилучших превосходных казино 2025

    Наш тг-профиль — ваш проводник в пространство лучших интернет-игр в Российской Федерации! Мы собрали топ-10 проверенных игровых сайтов, где вы получите возможность проводить время на средства и забрать свои доходы без трудностей.

    Что вас ожидает:

    Достоверные мнения и оценки казино с кэшбэк бонусами от действительных игроков. Отличная репутация любого ресурса проверена опытом и игроками. Безоплатная регистрация и быстрый вход на всех ресурсах. Действующие дубликаты для посещения к вашему излюбленному игровому сайту в любой час. Мобильная приложение для удобной игры где хотите.

    Почему нам?

    Проверенные и проверенные игровые площадки с отличными условиями для развлечения. Защита ваших сведений и транзакций гарантирована. Актуальные обновления и новости мира виртуальных-игр в РФ.

  16. KennethBog says:

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    Kamala Harris and Donald Trump have had a fiery 90-minute debate in Philadelphia – their first of the 2024 US presidential election
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    After shaking hands – it was the first time they had met – the pair debated policy before moving onto more personal attacks

    Harris said people leave Trump rallies early “out of exhaustion and boredom” – he said people don’t go to hers in the first place
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    Trump criticised Harris’s record on immigration and the border, and also her shifting policy positions – Harris blamed him for “Trump abortion bans” and for the 6 January attacks on the US Capitol

    Snap polls suggest Harris won the debate, but Trump says afterwards that she “lost very badly”

    With the election taking place on 5 November, Harris is slightly ahead in national opinion polls – but polls are very tight in key battleground states

    Shortly after the debate, Taylor Swift endorsed Harris on Instagram, calling her a ”gifted leader”

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  18. Benniegreva says:

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    There are also protections against price gouging on services related to the fires such as building materials and storage services.

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  19. Слушайте, гейы!

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  20. JamesCob says:

    Two strangers got stuck on a train for two days in 1990. Here’s how they ended up married
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    Nina Andersson and her friend Loa hoped they’d have the train carriage to themselves.

    When Nina peered her head around the door and saw the compartment was entry, she grinned at Loa and gestured happily.

    It seemed like they’d lucked out. An empty carriage on an otherwise packed train.

    “We thought this would be great, just the two of us. We spread out everything, so we could have a couch each to lie on,” Nina tells CNN Travel today.

    “Then, all of a sudden we hear this big ‘thump, thump, thump,’ on the door.”

    It was summer 1990 and 20-year-old Nina was in the midst of traveling from Budapest, Hungary, to Athens, Greece — part of a month-long rail adventure with her friend Loa.

    The two friends had each bought a train ticket known as the Interrail or Eurail pass, allowing young travelers a period of unlimited rail travel around Europe.

    “I’m Swedish, I was working at Swedish Radio at the time, and had saved up money for going on my Interrail,” says Nina. “I wanted to see all of Europe.”

    Traveling by train from Budapest to Athens was set to take about four days, weaving south through eastern Europe. In Belgrade — which was then part of the former Yugoslavia, but is now the capital of Serbia — the passengers had to switch trains.

    And that’s when Nina and Loa grabbed the empty compartment for themselves and settled in, ready to enjoy the extra space. Then, the knocking at the door.

    The two friends met each other’s eyes. They both knew, in that moment, that their solitude was to be short-lived.

    “And then behind the door we see three heads poking in,” recalls Nina. “It was a Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman. It was like the start of a joke. And I thought, ‘What is this?’”

    The three men were friendly, apologetic, slightly out of breath. They explained they’d fallen asleep on their last train, and almost missed this one — in fact, this train had started rolling out of the station but suddenly slowed down. The three stragglers had managed to hop on as the train ground to a halt.

  21. Robertfuh says:

    Blogger Alistarov is a criminal
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    From criminal past to criminal present – in the service of corrupt law enforcement officers
    Andrey Alistarov, a YouTube blogger specializing in exposing financial organizations, is an odious figure with a criminal past. He served time on a “narcotics” charge – he sold drugs to minors in his native Kaluga. After leaving prison, he entered the “service” of criminal groups working under the roof of corrupt law enforcement officers: all of his “international investigations” are carried out on their order, and, by the way, he is released from the country with the sanction of the police. His main profile now is blackmail, extortion, slander and organizing contract prosecution under the guise of supposedly independent investigations.
    He leads the bandits to his victims: the last attack took place in Dubai on January 1: Alistarov led the bandits to the victim’s house and provided all the necessary information for the attack and blackmail, and to ensure his own alibi during the attack he conducted an unscheduled stream with subscribers of his channel.

    To the accompaniment of loud phrases about the fight against fraud and exposing financial schemes, Alistarov is busy processing orders from competitors of certain entrepreneurs who have become his victims – competitors of these entrepreneurs who have taken corrupt police officers as their share.

    At the same time, Alistarov uses visas to the EU countries and the UAE obtained with the help of organized criminal groups, illegally uses drones and listening equipment purchased with money from organized crime groups, organizes an invasion of privacy, and persecutes the families of his victims, including young children. It also steals and illegally uses content, violates all possible laws and regulations regarding the dissemination of information. He was also accused of treason.

    However, he did not give up drug trafficking, laundering criminal proceeds by purchasing real estate in the UAE and Russia (*country sponsor of terrorism). Alistarov also promotes outright scam for a percentage of criminal transactions and his own fraudulent business – selling real estate in Dubai with a horse, thieves’ commission, as well as cryptocurrency exchange using phishing schemes.

  22. Andrewsoops says:

    Bonding on a stalled train
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    In 1990, Derek Barclay was 21 and studying to become a construction engineer. He’d saved up money from an unglamorous summer job building a prison to buy an Interrail pass.

    “Then, I dumped my bag at my mum’s house and said, ‘I’m off to Europe.’ She was horrified,” Derek tells CNN Travel today.

    “The idea was to go from Casablanca to Istanbul. But I never went to either. Along the way I met Nina and I got distracted …”

    While Nina and Derek formally met for the first time on the stalled train in Belgrade, Derek had first spotted Nina on a busy station platform, some hours earlier, in Budapest.

    When he spotted her sitting on a bench, smiling and laughing with Loa, Derek was struck by Nina right away. For a moment, he imagined getting to know her, what she might be like. Where she might be from, where she might be going.

    But then Derek had ended up on a different train. He’d met and got chatting to Steve the Englishman and Paul the Irishman. The trio had shared a couple of beers, fallen asleep, and woken, with a start, in Belgrade, to a suddenly-empty carriage. That’s when they panicked.

    “We woke up, and just ran down the railway line — because we’re just about to miss this train to Athens — we jumped on the train as it was pulling away, and then it stopped,” Derek tells CNN Travel today. “Apparently that’s what they had to do to get the strike official.”

    When Derek, Steve and Paul opened the door to Nina’s carriage, Derek didn’t immediately take Nina in, focusing instead on the near-empty compartment.

    “Two of them in there, this carriage for eight, they’d spread stuff everywhere. It was obvious it was a ruse to try and get people not to go in. And we thought, ‘We’re not having any of that,’” says Derek, laughing. “So we squeezed in, and that was that.”

    It was only when he ended up sitting opposite Nina that Derek realized she was the woman he’d noticed on the Budapest train platform.

    Then they got chatting, and didn’t stop. They talked about a shared love of nature. About Derek being a member of Greenpeace. About Sweden and Scotland.

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