7 Reasons Why A Girl Won’t Have Sex With You

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So you found a girl, built up attraction, and did everything you were supposed to do, yet you can’t seem to close the deal.  What’s wrong?  Why can’t you get her between the sheets?  Well, sometimes its nothing you’ve done wrong, rather, there are circumstances that are beyond your control.  Here are 7 reasons why a girl might not want to sleep with you…

7.  She’s on Her Period:  She may not tell you that that’s the reason, but it’s always a possibility. Has she mentioned that she’s been head-achey or has some cramps? Has she excused herself to the bathroom a bit more than usual? Did she stab you at dinner? These are good indicators.

6. She Didn’t Shave and She’s Embarrassed:  To quote one of my female friends that this happened to, “Unexpected sex has unanticipated consequences.” Some women specifically believe that sex will NOT be happening on a particular night. But she’s got a right to change her mind, doesn’t she? We think so. So whether it’s a burning bush of biblical proportions or just some leg scruff, keep in mind how embarrassed you’d be if you forgot to brush your teeth and your lady wanted a little tongue action.

5.  She Thinks You’ll Think She’s a Slut:  I could literally write a whole educational thesis on this topic, but I’ll spare you. Whether you think she is or isn’t a slut doesn’t make a difference with this situation, unfortunately. How well you can communicate to her that you’re not going to view her any differently and that you’re comfortable with whatever she’s comfortable with will help, though.

4.  You Hesitated:  Okay, we do have to touch on one reason it could be you. It’s because you hesitated. Women turn on like an oven and off like a light. Men turn on like a light and off like an oven. So if you’re basting an 8 lb. bird twice per hour for 5 hours at 350 degrees, how turned on is she? Wait, I forgot what we were talking about. Anyway, if you hesitate when making your moves she’ll be able to sense your insecurity and that can easily ruin the outcome of your evening. Be firm with your actions, but mindful of her needs.

3.  She is Worried You’ll Get Rid of Her:  Some guys are very goal-oriented and will work hard to get into a girl’s pants and then get the hell out of dodge right after because “mission accomplished.” Other guys work hard to create a connection so he can eventually wife her up proper. But, whether it’s the goal, the byproduct or an exit strategy, sex is often on a guy’s mind. If you care about the girl you’re with and get a sense of what her concerns might be, then a little patience will go a long way.

2.  She Really Likes You:  Sometimes you can tell how much a new girl likes you and then when she wants to take things slow it’s almost like a logic hiccup in a guy’s mind. But, try to keep things in perspective. The fact that she likes you enough to want to slow you down is a good thing and another situation where your patience will add a lot of value to the relationship.

1.  It’s a Power Play:  Sometimes women withhold sex to put themselves in a position of power. If this is the case with your girl, then have a conversation about it so that a power struggle doesn’t occur. Or just run for the hills.

Ovulating Women Unconsciously Buy Sexier Clothing to Outdo Attractive Women

The University Of Minnesota just released a new study that reveals women who are ovulating are more likely to dress provocatively – not to attract men, but to outdo other women!

Ovulating women unconsciously buy sexier clothes, says new research from the University of Minnesota’s Carlson School of Management. The study finds that ovulating women unconsciously dress to impress — doing so not to impress men, but to outdo rival women during the handful of days each month when they are ovulating.

“The desire for women at peak fertility to unconsciously choose products that enhance appearance is driven by a desire to outdo attractive rival women,” says Kristina Durante, a post-doctoral fellow at the Carlson School. “If you look more desirable than your competition, you are more likely to stand out.”

This research, forthcoming in the Journal of Consumer Research, provides some of the first evidence of how, why, and when consumer behavior is influenced by hormonal factors. Durante and co-authors focused their predictions on the fact that competition for a suitable partner would be influenced by a woman’s fertility status.

“We found that, when ovulating, women chose sexier fashion products when thinking about other attractive, local but not distant women,” says Durante. “If you are in New York, a woman who lives in LA isn’t going to be seen as competition.”

Although the end result is to attract the best romantic partner available, Durante’s research found that ovulating women’s choice of dress is motivated by the other women in their environment. “In order to entice a desirable mate, a woman needs to assess the attractiveness of other women in her local environment to determine how eye-catching she needs to be to snare a good man,” Durante says.

I guess that explains why so many PUAs have had experiences of picking up hot chicks, only to have them unexpectedly “pull away” at the last minute.  In case you haven’t been there, here’s the scenerio:

You go out to a bar or club, find a super-hot girl, do your work, get her attracted to you, start making out and stuff – its on.  You know it.  She knows it.  And yet, at the last minute, she puts the breaks on things.

Some guys might wonder what they did wrong, when in fact – they did NOTHING wrong.  That pesky Aunt Flo was around and reared her ugly head.  So why was a girl on her period out and about?  According to this study, not to hook up with you, but to show up other girls!  lol.  I guess that’s just more proof that women are koo-koo!

How To Escape Being “Friended”

A poster named Regal had a great tip on mASF about avoiding having a girl “Friend” you when you’re trying to get sexual with her.

Regal writes:

I’ve never really been the kind of guy who got the “Let’s just be friends” speech — I’m typically too aggressive / inconsiderate to realistically be considered “friends” material by women.

That said, I’ll hear it occassionally if I’m escalating with a girl who’s trying to resist me — maybe she wants to slow things down because she likes me as a boyfriend, or maybe she’s in a committed relationship or has reservations about me for some other reason or she just hasn’t decided she’s ready to sleep with me yet.

When you get something like, “Maybe it’s better if we’re just friends,” or, “I think you’d make a good friend,” there’s one easy, powerful statement you can make to shut that down and communicate your intentions:

“I don’t want to be your friend.”

Say it with a half-smile and bedroom eyes… and be sexy about it.

Nice guys won’t use this line, because they’re too scared to risk losing the girl in question from their lives by telling her they don’t want to be her friend. “Oh no, if I tell her I don’t want her as a friend, she’ll leave me!” they think. Then, they keep her as a friend while she sleeps with some other, stronger man.

When you tell her this, you instantly show her you’re not one of those guys.

Another reason it’s a strong statement is that it makes it clear what you DO want; if you’re spending time with her, touching her, laughing with her, but you don’t want to be her friend, there’s only one other thing you CAN be.

And you also force her to make a choice. She knows now that you’re not going to be her friend. She also knows that it’s your intention to sleep with her. If she chooses to stay with you, she’s accepting your advances. So, in making this statement, you force her to make a conscious decision to accept your advances. And since the force of inertia means it’s a lot easier for her to stay and accept it than fight it and leave, unless she hates your guts she’s not going to go.

Obviously, this won’t work if she doesn’t actually LIKE you… but if you’re sexy and you’re doing what you should be doing, this is a strong statement that swats objections out of the way and ramps up her attraction for you. It’s lain along the path to a few lays for me, and I don’t hear this objection a whole lot.

Next time you do, give it a try…

I couldn’t agree with this more.  Too often, guys allow the girl they are with to set the frame.  When she says she just “wants to be friends,” most guys accept that as being true and try to deal with it.  What Regal is suggesting here is totally dismissing the premise of that frame entirely and having her choose to accept your frame or not.

Good stuff.