7 Reasons Why A Girl Won’t Have Sex With You
October 11, 2011 by Thundercat
Filed under Articles
So you found a girl, built up attraction, and did everything you were supposed to do, yet you can’t seem to close the deal. What’s wrong? Why can’t you get her between the sheets? Well, sometimes its nothing you’ve done wrong, rather, there are circumstances that are beyond your control. Here are 7 reasons why a girl might not want to sleep with you…
7. She’s on Her Period: She may not tell you that that’s the reason, but it’s always a possibility. Has she mentioned that she’s been head-achey or has some cramps? Has she excused herself to the bathroom a bit more than usual? Did she stab you at dinner? These are good indicators.
6. She Didn’t Shave and She’s Embarrassed: To quote one of my female friends that this happened to, “Unexpected sex has unanticipated consequences.” Some women specifically believe that sex will NOT be happening on a particular night. But she’s got a right to change her mind, doesn’t she? We think so. So whether it’s a burning bush of biblical proportions or just some leg scruff, keep in mind how embarrassed you’d be if you forgot to brush your teeth and your lady wanted a little tongue action.
5. She Thinks You’ll Think She’s a Slut: I could literally write a whole educational thesis on this topic, but I’ll spare you. Whether you think she is or isn’t a slut doesn’t make a difference with this situation, unfortunately. How well you can communicate to her that you’re not going to view her any differently and that you’re comfortable with whatever she’s comfortable with will help, though.
4. You Hesitated: Okay, we do have to touch on one reason it could be you. It’s because you hesitated. Women turn on like an oven and off like a light. Men turn on like a light and off like an oven. So if you’re basting an 8 lb. bird twice per hour for 5 hours at 350 degrees, how turned on is she? Wait, I forgot what we were talking about. Anyway, if you hesitate when making your moves she’ll be able to sense your insecurity and that can easily ruin the outcome of your evening. Be firm with your actions, but mindful of her needs.
3. She is Worried You’ll Get Rid of Her: Some guys are very goal-oriented and will work hard to get into a girl’s pants and then get the hell out of dodge right after because “mission accomplished.” Other guys work hard to create a connection so he can eventually wife her up proper. But, whether it’s the goal, the byproduct or an exit strategy, sex is often on a guy’s mind. If you care about the girl you’re with and get a sense of what her concerns might be, then a little patience will go a long way.
2. She Really Likes You: Sometimes you can tell how much a new girl likes you and then when she wants to take things slow it’s almost like a logic hiccup in a guy’s mind. But, try to keep things in perspective. The fact that she likes you enough to want to slow you down is a good thing and another situation where your patience will add a lot of value to the relationship.
1. It’s a Power Play: Sometimes women withhold sex to put themselves in a position of power. If this is the case with your girl, then have a conversation about it so that a power struggle doesn’t occur. Or just run for the hills.
Great Anti-Slut-Defense Reframe
February 15, 2010 by Thundercat
Filed under Tips & Tricks
TVA Oslo over on the mASF forums has a great tip for getting past a girl’s last-minute Anti-Slut Defense (ASD). Check it out:
TVA Oslo writes:
Most ASD is due to her being affraid of what her friend thinks of her when she does a sexual act. A girl can avoid having sex with you because she is very affraid of what her entourage will think of it. Most men love bragging (I do too, but I never tell who I fucked, so it doesn’t count, I just say I fucked a girl). Men brags, girlfriends find out about it, especially in social cirles. But this one will also work in non-social circle settings.
Fact is. If none of her friends knows about anything you’ve done with a girl, they won’t judge your sweatheart.
This technique is a way to show her that you will not tell her friends. It’s very simple. Everyone can do it right now. No risks!
Here is what you do.
When you know it’s on, almost close to getting a lay (around final escalations, or at a point were things are turning VERY sexual) and you feel you don’t have controle of the ASD (like she does have ASD symptoms or actually get an ASD kick), try this:TVA: What ever happen tonight between us… please do me a favor.
HB: Which
TVA: Don’t tell ANYONE about it okey
HB: (100% guarrantee she will complie on this one) No I won’t
TVA: I don’t want anyone to know anything about my private life. There is nothing wrong with you, but I like to keep things for myself… can you promise me that?
HB: Yeah
TVA: really! I beg you to do it
HB: I will
TVA: thanks you are lovely (go kino… reward good behaviour with horniness remember… no more ASD… gogogo)Girls are affraid of what her friend will think of her. By proving you will not tell anyone, is a good way to get rid of the ASD. By begging her to not tell anyone, you are the one who cares about it. You reframed it. You are the one who don’t want anyone to know about what you do in private. This projects that you will not tell anyone since you are the one begging her to keep quiet about it. Pretty easy concept right?
Tell me if you don’t understand. I think you will, but you never know.
A pitfall is (even if they are rare):
TVA: What ever happen tonight between us… please do me a favor…
HB: It won’t happen anything tonight (clear sign of no sexual attraction, but if you want to keep trying, keep reading)
TVA: I am not saying it will, but people have that magical process, when they lose controle of their horniness, nothing wrong with that, it’s awesome, it just happens you know.Completly okey I just want to make sure that if that happen, it happens in good conditions and we keep it secret. (and on and one to sexual reframing, DAFS in advanced in the archive on this technique)Gogo escalation… no more ASD.
Have fun!
One important thing to note about this post is the re-frame here. For those of you new to the game, think of it like this… the girl has a “frame of mind” that there are negative connotations to sleeping with you. Hense the “anti-slut defense” popping up. This post gave a great example of how to “re-frame” that objection to you sleeping with her. In essence, you frame the situation in a different way that makes it okay for her to do what you want her to.
Re-framing is a great way to get around ANY objection a girl has. Good salesmen re-frame all the time. Whenever a customer objects to something, they re-frame it so it becomes a benefit as opposed to an objection.
What TVA Oslo does here is he reframes the situation so that the girl knows whatever happens between them will remain intimate and private. So she doesn’t have to worry about word getting out that she may have partaken in “slutty” behavior amongst her friends. But he frames it in such a way where privacy and intimacy is IMPORTANT to him! He’s basically taking what the girl feels she needs and adopting it for himself. Very slick here.
Can you guys think of any other good reframes for common objections?