Thundercat Does Porn! (Well, Not Really…)

August 24, 2007 by  
Filed under Field Report

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So as you guys know, I had the pleasure of attending an event at the Playboy mansion very recently where not only did I party my ass off, but I also did a great deal of networking.

There were a number of porn stars in attendance at the Playboy mansion, and oddly enough I found myself INVITED to a porn shoot this past week.

Now, I’d never been to the shooting of an actual porn movie before.  But considering I live in Los Angeles, porn capital of the world, and have yet to experience it, I’d say that it was a golden opportunity to cross off "Visit Porn Shoot" from my list of things to do before I die.

So I found myself driving up to the San Fernando Valley in the blistering afternoon sun to a studio where the porn movie was being shot.  Now, this was an ACTUAL studio, not some house they were shooting a movie at.  There were sound stages, props, and all kinds of movie stuff.  I was surprised at the professionalism of the set.

The crew was very small.  There was a director, photographer, lighting assistant, and grip.  That was it.  Then there were the performers.  Different performers would come in throughout the day, shoot for close to an hour, and then leave.  I was there for around 3 different scenes.

Watching a porn being shot is a very odd experience.  I’ve never really been in a room watching other people have sex before.  Despite being incredibly surreal, it actually wasn’t too bad of an experience.

The first thing I saw when I walked into the studio was a huge, muscular guy, drenched in sweat, with a third arm between his legs, pounding a petite blond girl wearing pink sneakers.  The girl looked like she was 15 years old!  (Apparently, that’s her "hook.")  The actress is some girl named Aubrey Adams.  I never got the guy’s name.

The set was incredibly HOT.  No, not sexually, I’m talking like "cook me alive" hot.  First off, it’s in the valley, which routinely gets to over 100 degrees in the summer.  The lights they use for filming add to the heat, and during scenes, all air conditioning has to be turned off for sound.  So while the sex is going on, everyone on the set is sweating like a stuck pig.

I was also surprised at the level of actual ACTING that goes on during the scenes.  I’m not talking about delivering lines or anything like that.  I’m talking about all the moaning and stuff.  Once the cameras are rolling, all the girls start acting like they’re getting the best sex of their lives.  As soon as the cameras stop, however, they’re aching and can barely walk.

Anyway, I got to hang out with the actresses – most of whom I had already met at the Playboy party.  I also got to hang out with the crew.  Everyone was incredibly nice, very friendly, and fun to hang around.  Some of their stories about being in the business were absolutely fascinating to hear.  I actually made pretty good friends with the director, and he gave me an open invitation to appear at any one of his shoots.

So here are some of the things I learned while I was there:

1.  Male porn stars shave their bodies before they do a shoot.  They don’t wax, they SHAVE.  This includes their balls.  Apparently, they buy special shaving cream for women who shave their legs, and use that in the shower.  Their razor of choice is the Gillet Mach 3.  Apparently there are the occasional nicks, but they said it’s nothing too bad.

2.  The secret for getting the "porno load" which is the huge cumshot, is to eat lots of celery and pineapple.  Apparently, celery makes you produce lots and lots of "man juice," while the pineapple gives it a "healthy" look and taste.

3.  All actors in porn get tested on a monthly basis for STDs.  They have to present their test results to the director before shooting.  The director told me never to have sex with a girl who allows guys to cum in her ass, since that’s a guaranteed way to get a disease.

4.  The girls all confessed to me that they don’t really like the "big porno dicks."  Most of them who have boyfriends or husbands prefer the "normal to small" size.  Though many of the girls LOOK like they enjoy the Big D’s on film, they say they are actually too painful in real life, and don’t like that in their personal life.

5.  The guys who work in porn apparently have crazy sex with all the girls.  Usually, if a guy has worked with a girl, he’s had sex with her.  All the guys on the crew confessed to me that not only have they had sex with almost all the girls they’ve worked with, but also that it’s hard for them to go back to "normal" girls because the porn chicks are so good in the sack, it makes every average girl pale in comparison.

So there you go.  That was my big visit to my first porn set!  Here are some pics and movies I took while I was there.  Enjoy!  (Warning:  Pics are NOT safe for work!)

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Here’s a shot of the porn set.  As you can see, they have different sets for different scenereos.

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The set was HUGE!  It took up an entire warehouse.

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There were a lot of additional backgrounds for when they need to change the stages.

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This was the first scene I walked in on where Porn Star Aubrey Adams was getting reamed by "Big Sweaty Dude." (I never got his porno name.  He was a really nice guy though.  I didn’t talk to him until he put some clothes on.)

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The scene went on for another 20 minutes.  They would start by taking still pictures, then shoot some live action sex, then pause for stills, then go back to finishing the sex, then finish up with shooting another set of stills.

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After the scene, the actors would get cleaned up, dress, and then go take a shower if they needed to.  Many of them didn’t wait around too long after they got their paycheck.

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There were some funny things on the set because despite the professionalism, the crew and actors liked to relax and have fun.  For some reason there was a blow-up sex doll in the rafters.  I never asked why.

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Next up was a scene with porn star Trina Michaels.  I had hung out with Trina at Playboy.  She’s a very nice girl.  Turns out she’s married!  Who’d have thought, right?

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Trina has some HUGE fake boobies. And she isn’t afraid to show them off!

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During the scene Trina got pounded so hard she had trouble walking afterwards.

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Apparently, this stuff is standard on all porn sets.

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Between scenes, the actors would just hang out and chill.

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Here’s a picture of the greenroom where the actors can keep their stuff and chill out while waiting for their scenes to start.  Oddly enough, the Director told me that most girls are usually 15-30 minutes late for their scenes.  If a girl doesn’t show up, they have to scrap the scene and pay the actors who did show up a $400 kill fee.

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Then the girls would change and get ready for the scene to begin.

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At the start of each scene, the girls would pose for still pictures.  This actress goes by the name "Brooke."  I forget what her last name is.  Apparently, she’s quite famous in the porn world.

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Sometimes the girls won’t know each other and meet for the first time right before the scene is set to shoot.  They’ll spend a few minutes talking to the director and each other about how the scene will go.

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At the start of the scene, the girls are all in costume.

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Those costumes don’t stay on for very long.

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Watching this stuff happen live is very different from watching the videos!

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The girls all gather together for the big finish of the lesbian scene.  All the orgasms are fake.  But who cares?

I also took some videos for you guys who want to see what it’s like on a real porn set.  I shot them using my Sony Camera, and they seem to play fine in Windows Media Player.

Porn Set Visit Video #1

Porn Set Visit Video #2

Porn Set Visit Video #3

Porn Set Visit Video #4

Porn Set Visit Video #5

Porn Set Visit Video #6

Porn Set Visit Video #7

Porn Set Visit Video #8

Porn Set Visit Video #9

The videos are quite graphic, and are NOT safe for work!  So be aware of that before you view them.

Get Your Free Guide Here!

Comments

52 Responses to “Thundercat Does Porn! (Well, Not Really…)”
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  2. Zacharyamefs says:

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