The Bar And Club Paradox

Okay, I got something I gotta get off my chest, and I think because of Mystery’s new reality show, it’s more important than ever.

A lot of guys in the community base all their exposure to women around bar and club sarging.

I see it all the time on message boards and emails I get from people.  It’s always about rolling into a club, and using openers and routines to meet women.

But there is a problem here.

A BIG problem.

And that problem is that bars and clubs are probably the worst places to meet women and experience real SUCCESS with them.

Seriously.  Sometimes you can meet great girls at a bar or club, but it takes an awful lot of work to do so, and it’s very inconsistent.

But for some reason, so many community guys have it in their heads that bars and clubs are the places to go to get chicks.

But they’re not.  I think because so many workshops take place in the bar/club environment, former students and other wanna-be PUAs are thinking that they need to go to these places to get a girl.

Understand:  Bars and Clubs are GREAT places to practice meeting women, but they are poor places for actually GETTING women.

And that, my friends, is the great Bar And Club Paradox.  (Henceforth known as BACP – yes, I am staking a claim to my very own acronym.)

Let me tell you – if you are a shy guy, or a guy who’s inexperienced with women – then by all means, you MUST go to a bar or club to practice your skills.  Nowhere else will you be able to hit so many targets in a relatively good amount of time.  To me, bars and clubs are like the practice field for football.  You don’t play in the stadium until the game starts.

Real bar and club pickups happen at a MUCH higher skill lever than most newbies can handle.  But getting over initial fears of approaching and anxiety are best done in that environment.

However, meeting great women you can actually have relationships happens OUTSIDE the bars and clubs.  And not enough guys in the community are focusing on that, in my opinion.

And when that happens, they get stuck in a rut, getting phone numbers from club girls, but nothing more.  Before long they get frustrated and revert back to their old ways.

But there are so many better venues for picking up women than the bar/club scene.  And you actually are able to find much more stable, non-crazy women outside of your typical bar or club.

So the moral of the BACP:  Practice your skills in bars and clubs, but do not rely on them to get quality dates with women.

Meeting women outside bars and clubs gets you much better success rates.  We’re talking less flakes on phone calls and dates.  Better quality girls.  Better experiences.  And most of all – WAY more sex!

So if you’re focusing all your energy on clubs and bars, you need to step back and add in a few more venues to your pick-up arsenal.