Dr. Neder on Beliefs
June 28, 2005 by Thundercat
Filed under Articles
Got an email from blog poster Handsom Man (who seems to have his own blog now, by the way =) who referenced an article written by Dr. Neder, of DYD fame, on Beliefs. So if you’re looking for some good info on Inner Game stuff, check it out by reading on below…
Update!
Just got this email from the good doctor himself…
Dr. Neder writes:
Hello ThunderCat!I appreciate you
posting my article on your site. However I’d like to point out just a few
discrepancies:1) I’m not of "DYD"
fame. I’ve written two books, recorded CD’s, written hundreds of articles, done
hundreds of TV and radio appearances, all under "Being a Man in a Woman’s
World". Perhaps you could correct that?2) I post articles
free of use (a new one each week by the way if you’re interested), and ask only
that you always include the following byline with them (at the end of the
article):————
Have a love, dating,
relationship, sex or man/woman question? I answer all email. You can write to me
at dwneder@beingaman.com for answers.
For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman’s World" (volumes I
& II), and other products visit: www.beingaman.com. Check out the discussion
group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman. Copyright (c) 2005,
Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
————
Dr. Dennis Neder’s Post on Beliefs
This is an interesting question with an even more interesting answer.
One
of the most popular forms of psychotherapy involves helping the client
change their belief system in order to deal with situations in
different ways. I have actually been working on a new method that is
more direct. I won’t go into all of this here as it’s far too
complicated and involved for the subject. However, here are some basic
steps you can use right now in order to begin this process:
1) Start with the end in mind.
In
other words, what outcome do you want? It’s not enough to simply say "I
want to meet chicks." Instead, you have to be very specific here and do
the same type of work you’d do with your goals. You can say something
like, "I will [note the positive, present tense in the statement] meet
5 women that fit my type in the next 30 days." You also have to
determine your "type" which you will from BAM1.
2) Visualize how your life will be different when you’ve reached your goal.
Can
you imagine what changes will occur in your life when you’ve
accomplished this? You absolutely must! Try to picture the positive
feelings of having 5 women’s numbers that want you to call them.
Imagine the calmness you’ll feel in relieving the tension from your
goal. By setting a goal like this, you create tension. That’s
important. By reaching it, you relieve this tension. That’s important
too. Work on imagining how you’ll feel, how things will look and even
how the world sounds when you’ve accomplished your goal! Focus on the
fact that you’re changing fundamentally simply in reaching your goal.
It’s that very change that’s critical. Once you change, you’ll never go
back to being the way you were before.
3) Turn up these feelings.
It’s
not enough to simply say, "Ok, I feel this way – that’s nice." You now
need to amplify them and feel them throughout your body. You need to
visualize the positive impact of reaching your goal and actually enjoy
the success – even though you haven’t yet reached it. Continue to do
this at least twice every day for the next week. More often and longer
is even better.
Think of this as a reward for having set the
goal in the first place. Reward yourself by imaging all the good things
you deserve as having already come to you and think deeply of the
person you’ll become through it. Don’t just feel good about the goal,
feel good about whom you’ve become in reaching the goal. The difference
is critical.
4) Project those feelings into action.
Before
you set out to actually accomplish your goal, "project forward" into
time that feeling of accomplishment. Get excited about achieving that
first (or next) step along your way. Actually see [through your own
eyes] that experience of accomplishing the first step. Imagine how
confident and centered you’ll feel because you’ve done it. Then, get
excited about the next step. Use the feelings of excitement to create
enthusiasm in your goal and continue to spur you on.
5) Continue to act until you reach your goal.
Don’t
give up. Continue your actions until you reach your goals. Give
concerted effort to accomplishing them, but don’t beat your head
against a wall. If your plans don’t help you get where you want to go,
then find new plans. Write your goals in concrete – they are never
changing; but write your plans in sand. The methods you use to
accomplish your goals aren’t important. Accomplishing them is!
6) Reward yourself for each accomplishment – even small ones.
These
rewards don’t have to be huge but they should have meaning. In other
words, it’s ok to tell yourself, "Good job!" and to feel that reward.
Likewise, as you continue along in accomplishing your goals, it’s ok -
and even good – to reward yourself in other ways too.
7) Don’t fail to set your next goal before you’re finished with the first!
This
is important. If you don’t set the next goal and try to ride the high
of accomplishing the first, you’ll never get very far. You want to
constantly be moving in the direction of your bigger, more important
goals by setting smaller ones short-term. Each step along the way gets
you closer to your big goals, but you need to see the next step before
you get to the end of the current one. In effect, these smaller goals
overlap into accomplishing your bigger goals. Your bigger goals overlap
into accomplishing your ultimate goals, and finally your ultimate goals
overlap into accomplishing your life’s plan.
————
Have a love, dating,
relationship, sex or man/woman question? I answer all email. You can write to me
at dwneder@beingaman.com for answers.
For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman’s World" (volumes I
& II), and other products visit: www.beingaman.com. Check out the discussion
group at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beingaman. Copyright (c) 2005,
Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved.
————






Tiny house with elaborate – and erotic – frescoes unearthed at Pompeii
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Archaeologists have uncovered a tiny house in Pompeii that is filled with elaborate – and sometimes erotic – frescoes, further revealing the ornate way in which Romans decorated their homes.
Situated in the central district of the ancient city, the house is smaller than normal and unusually lacks the open central courtyard – known as an atrium – that is typical of Roman architecture, the Archaeological Park of Pompeii, which oversees the site, said in a statement Thursday.
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This change could have occurred due to shifting trends in Roman – and particularly Pompeian – society, during the first century AD, archaeologists said.
Pompeii was destroyed by the eruption of Mount Vesuvius in AD 79 when its buildings and thousands of inhabitants were buried beneath layers of ash and pumice. This coating perfectly preserved the city for millennia, making it one of the most important archaeological sites in the world as it offers an unprecedented insight into Roman daily life.
This latest discovery spotlights the ornate decorations that rich Romans enjoyed in their homes – several frescoes depict mythical scenes and others are decorated with plant and animal motifs on a white background.
One small square painting set against a blue-painted wall depicts intercourse between a satyr and a nymph, while another shows Hippolytus, son of the mythical Greek king Theseus, and his stepmother Phaedra who fell in love with him before killing herself when he rejected her in disgust.
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A ring found among the debris of Florida’s recent hurricanes awaits its owner
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Scattered across Florida’s hurricane-ravaged communities are piles of debris, remnants of what were once homes. Cherished memories — photo albums, family heirlooms, and tokens of love — swallowed by floodwaters and carried miles away, are now reduced to mere fragments and discarded amid the wreckage.
But in one of these piles of lost memories, a small, inconspicuous velvet black box was discovered with a ring and a note that read: “I was 18 when my parents gave it to me.”
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Now, Joe Kovach, the engineer managing one of the debris sites in Tarpon Springs, Florida, where the box was found, is searching for its owner.
“Everyone has been basically dumping their entire lives onto the curb after the storm when everything flooded. My own boss’ house had 30 inches (of water) in it, and I saw his face and just how devastating it can be for everyone,” Kovach, an engineer with Pinellas County Public Works, told CNN.
“A lot of people in the community were really affected by these two storms, if there’s just a little bit I can do to give back, then that’s perfect.”
A contractor, who was gathering and condensing debris with an excavator, discovered the ring when he looked down and saw the box.
“This was a needle in a haystack for sure. For something like that to survive all that when everything else was so wet and saturated, that was kind of incredible,” Kovach said.
Although the ring was found after Hurricane Milton, Kovach is sure the treasure was initially lost amid the ruins of Hurricane Helene, based on the pile of debris it came from, which Pinellas County Public Works tracks. It is likely the owner of the ring is from Crystal Beach, Ozona, or Palm Harbor, Kovach said.
On Tuesday, after the contractor informed him about the ring, Kovach posted a photo of the box and the note on several local community Facebook pages, asking if it belonged to anyone. He did not include a photo or description of the ring to ensure it is returned to the rightful owner who can accurately describe it. On the inside lid of the box is a gold engraving with the jewelry brand, “The Danbury Mint.”
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A giant meteorite boiled the oceans 3.2 billion years ago. Scientists say it was a ‘fertilizer bomb’ for life
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A massive space rock, estimated to be the size of four Mount Everests, slammed into Earth more than 3 billion years ago — and the impact could have been unexpectedly beneficial for the earliest forms of life on our planet, according to new research.
Typically, when a large space rock crashes into Earth, the impacts are associated with catastrophic devastation, as in the case of the demise of the dinosaurs 66 million years ago, when a roughly 6.2-mile-wide (10-kilometer) asteroid crashed off the coast of the Yucatan Peninsula in what’s now Mexico.
But Earth was young and a very different place when the S2 meteorite, estimated to have 50 to 200 times more mass than the dinosaur extinction-triggering Chicxulub asteroid, collided with the planet 3.26 billion years ago, according to Nadja Drabon, assistant professor of Earth and planetary sciences at Harvard University. She is also lead author of a new study describing the S2 impact and what followed in its aftermath that published Monday in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
“No complex life had formed yet, and only single-celled life was present in the form of bacteria and archaea,” Drabon wrote in an email. “The oceans likely contained some life, but not as much as today in part due to a lack of nutrients. Some people even describe the Archean oceans as ‘biological deserts.’ The Archean Earth was a water world with few islands sticking out. It would have been a curious sight, as the oceans were probably green in color from iron-rich deep waters.”
When the S2 meteorite hit, global chaos ensued — but the impact also stirred up ingredients that might have enriched bacterial life, Drabon said. The new findings could change the way scientists understand how Earth and its fledgling life responded to bombardment from space rocks not long after the planet formed.
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Groundbreaking telescope reveals first piece of new cosmic map
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I’ve covered space exploration for nearly a decade at CNN, and there has never been a more exciting time to follow space and science discoveries. As researchers push forward to explore and understand the cosmos, advancements in technology are sparking rapid developments in rocketry, astronomical observatories and a multitude of scientific instruments.
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Look no further than the missions racing to unlock dark matter and the mysterious force known as dark energy, both so named precisely because science has yet to explain these phenomena.
Astronomers have never detected dark matter, but they believe it makes up about 85% of the total matter in the universe. Meanwhile, the existence of dark energy helps researchers explain why the universe is expanding — and why that expansion is speeding up.
Extraordinary new scientific instruments are churning out trailblazing data, ready to reshape how scientists view the cosmos.
A prime example is the European Space Agency’s wide-angle Euclid telescope that launched in 2023 to investigate the riddles of dark energy and dark matter.
Euclid this week delivered the first piece of a cosmic map — containing about 100 million stars and galaxies — that will take six years to create.
These stunning 3D observations may help scientists see how dark matter warps light and curves space across galaxies.
Meanwhile, on a mountaintop in northern Chile, the US National Science Foundation and Stanford University researchers are preparing to power up the world’s largest digital camera inside the Vera C. Rubin Observatory.
Unearthed
In the mountains of Uzbekistan, a research team used lasers strapped to a flying robot to uncover two cities buried and lost for centuries.
The anthropologists said they had mapped these forgotten medieval towns for the first time — located at a key crossroad of ancient silk trade routes — using a drone equipped with LiDAR, or light detection and ranging equipment.
When nature reclaims what’s left of once thriving civilizations, scientists are increasingly turning to remote sensing to peer through dense vegetation.
The images revealed two large settlements dotted with watchtowers, fortresses, complex buildings, plazas and pathways that tens of thousands of people may have called home.
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Summer might be the most popular season for tourism to Europe, but it hardly promises a calm, cool and collected experience.
Who can forget this summer’s protests against overtourism in Barcelona and Mallorca, the wildfires that raged across Greece during the country’s hottest June and July on record and selfie stoplights to help control crowds on the clogged streets of Rome and Florence?
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From roughly mid-October to mid-December, shoulder season for travel to Europe comes with fewer crowds, far more comfortable temperatures in places that skew scorching hot during the summer months and plunging prices on airfare and accommodation.
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“The cheapest time to fly to Europe is typically from about the middle point of October to the middle point of December,” said Hayley Berg, lead economist at travel platform Hopper. “Airfare prices during those eight or nine weeks or so will typically be about an average of 40% lower than prices in the peak of summer in June.”
Hopper’s data shows that airfare to Europe from the United States during the period between October 20 and December 8 is averaging between $560 and $630 per ticket — down 9% from this time last year and 5% compared to the same timeframe in 2019.
Groundbreaking telescope reveals first piece of new cosmic map
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Greetings, earthlings! I’m Jackie Wattles, and I’m thrilled to be a new name bringing awe to your inbox.
I’ve covered space exploration for nearly a decade at CNN, and there has never been a more exciting time to follow space and science discoveries. As researchers push forward to explore and understand the cosmos, advancements in technology are sparking rapid developments in rocketry, astronomical observatories and a multitude of scientific instruments.
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Look no further than the missions racing to unlock dark matter and the mysterious force known as dark energy, both so named precisely because science has yet to explain these phenomena.
Astronomers have never detected dark matter, but they believe it makes up about 85% of the total matter in the universe. Meanwhile, the existence of dark energy helps researchers explain why the universe is expanding — and why that expansion is speeding up.
Extraordinary new scientific instruments are churning out trailblazing data, ready to reshape how scientists view the cosmos.
A prime example is the European Space Agency’s wide-angle Euclid telescope that launched in 2023 to investigate the riddles of dark energy and dark matter.
Euclid this week delivered the first piece of a cosmic map — containing about 100 million stars and galaxies — that will take six years to create.
These stunning 3D observations may help scientists see how dark matter warps light and curves space across galaxies.
Meanwhile, on a mountaintop in northern Chile, the US National Science Foundation and Stanford University researchers are preparing to power up the world’s largest digital camera inside the Vera C. Rubin Observatory.
Unearthed
In the mountains of Uzbekistan, a research team used lasers strapped to a flying robot to uncover two cities buried and lost for centuries.
The anthropologists said they had mapped these forgotten medieval towns for the first time — located at a key crossroad of ancient silk trade routes — using a drone equipped with LiDAR, or light detection and ranging equipment.
When nature reclaims what’s left of once thriving civilizations, scientists are increasingly turning to remote sensing to peer through dense vegetation.
The images revealed two large settlements dotted with watchtowers, fortresses, complex buildings, plazas and pathways that tens of thousands of people may have called home.
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Summer might be the most popular season for tourism to Europe, but it hardly promises a calm, cool and collected experience.
Who can forget this summer’s protests against overtourism in Barcelona and Mallorca, the wildfires that raged across Greece during the country’s hottest June and July on record and selfie stoplights to help control crowds on the clogged streets of Rome and Florence?
For travelers looking to avoid all that — as well as break less of a sweat literally and financially — welcome to Europe’s secret season.
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From roughly mid-October to mid-December, shoulder season for travel to Europe comes with fewer crowds, far more comfortable temperatures in places that skew scorching hot during the summer months and plunging prices on airfare and accommodation.
Plunging prices
“The cheapest time to fly to Europe is typically from about the middle point of October to the middle point of December,” said Hayley Berg, lead economist at travel platform Hopper. “Airfare prices during those eight or nine weeks or so will typically be about an average of 40% lower than prices in the peak of summer in June.”
Hopper’s data shows that airfare to Europe from the United States during the period between October 20 and December 8 is averaging between $560 and $630 per ticket — down 9% from this time last year and 5% compared to the same timeframe in 2019.
Это уже не борьба за справедливость, это циничная игра на выживание честных компаний. “Бест Вей” и “Гермес” могли бы сейчас продолжать работать, помогать людям с жильём, поддерживать участников СВО. Но правоохранительные органы устроили настоящую охоту на всех, кто осмелился создать что-то полезное. Идёт захват активов, блокировка счетов, подставные “потерпевшие” — у них просто нет ни стыда, ни совести! Колокольцев, что это за комедия? Мы хотим видеть наказание для тех, кто разрушает жизнь простых людей, а не слушать сказки про “финансовую пирамиду”. Если кто и заслуживает уголовного дела, так это те, кто сейчас пакостит в кооперативе и ворует будущее у сотен семей. И это – государственные служащие? Да стыдно называть их такими!
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Greetings, earthlings! I’m Jackie Wattles, and I’m thrilled to be a new name bringing awe to your inbox.
I’ve covered space exploration for nearly a decade at CNN, and there has never been a more exciting time to follow space and science discoveries. As researchers push forward to explore and understand the cosmos, advancements in technology are sparking rapid developments in rocketry, astronomical observatories and a multitude of scientific instruments.
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Look no further than the missions racing to unlock dark matter and the mysterious force known as dark energy, both so named precisely because science has yet to explain these phenomena.
Astronomers have never detected dark matter, but they believe it makes up about 85% of the total matter in the universe. Meanwhile, the existence of dark energy helps researchers explain why the universe is expanding — and why that expansion is speeding up.
Extraordinary new scientific instruments are churning out trailblazing data, ready to reshape how scientists view the cosmos.
A prime example is the European Space Agency’s wide-angle Euclid telescope that launched in 2023 to investigate the riddles of dark energy and dark matter.
Euclid this week delivered the first piece of a cosmic map — containing about 100 million stars and galaxies — that will take six years to create.
These stunning 3D observations may help scientists see how dark matter warps light and curves space across galaxies.
Meanwhile, on a mountaintop in northern Chile, the US National Science Foundation and Stanford University researchers are preparing to power up the world’s largest digital camera inside the Vera C. Rubin Observatory.
Unearthed
In the mountains of Uzbekistan, a research team used lasers strapped to a flying robot to uncover two cities buried and lost for centuries.
The anthropologists said they had mapped these forgotten medieval towns for the first time — located at a key crossroad of ancient silk trade routes — using a drone equipped with LiDAR, or light detection and ranging equipment.
When nature reclaims what’s left of once thriving civilizations, scientists are increasingly turning to remote sensing to peer through dense vegetation.
The images revealed two large settlements dotted with watchtowers, fortresses, complex buildings, plazas and pathways that tens of thousands of people may have called home.
Groundbreaking telescope reveals first piece of new cosmic map
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Greetings, earthlings! I’m Jackie Wattles, and I’m thrilled to be a new name bringing awe to your inbox.
I’ve covered space exploration for nearly a decade at CNN, and there has never been a more exciting time to follow space and science discoveries. As researchers push forward to explore and understand the cosmos, advancements in technology are sparking rapid developments in rocketry, astronomical observatories and a multitude of scientific instruments.
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Look no further than the missions racing to unlock dark matter and the mysterious force known as dark energy, both so named precisely because science has yet to explain these phenomena.
Astronomers have never detected dark matter, but they believe it makes up about 85% of the total matter in the universe. Meanwhile, the existence of dark energy helps researchers explain why the universe is expanding — and why that expansion is speeding up.
Extraordinary new scientific instruments are churning out trailblazing data, ready to reshape how scientists view the cosmos.
A prime example is the European Space Agency’s wide-angle Euclid telescope that launched in 2023 to investigate the riddles of dark energy and dark matter.
Euclid this week delivered the first piece of a cosmic map — containing about 100 million stars and galaxies — that will take six years to create.
These stunning 3D observations may help scientists see how dark matter warps light and curves space across galaxies.
Meanwhile, on a mountaintop in northern Chile, the US National Science Foundation and Stanford University researchers are preparing to power up the world’s largest digital camera inside the Vera C. Rubin Observatory.
Unearthed
In the mountains of Uzbekistan, a research team used lasers strapped to a flying robot to uncover two cities buried and lost for centuries.
The anthropologists said they had mapped these forgotten medieval towns for the first time — located at a key crossroad of ancient silk trade routes — using a drone equipped with LiDAR, or light detection and ranging equipment.
When nature reclaims what’s left of once thriving civilizations, scientists are increasingly turning to remote sensing to peer through dense vegetation.
The images revealed two large settlements dotted with watchtowers, fortresses, complex buildings, plazas and pathways that tens of thousands of people may have called home.
Europe’s secret season for travel starts now
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Summer might be the most popular season for tourism to Europe, but it hardly promises a calm, cool and collected experience.
Who can forget this summer’s protests against overtourism in Barcelona and Mallorca, the wildfires that raged across Greece during the country’s hottest June and July on record and selfie stoplights to help control crowds on the clogged streets of Rome and Florence?
For travelers looking to avoid all that — as well as break less of a sweat literally and financially — welcome to Europe’s secret season.
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From roughly mid-October to mid-December, shoulder season for travel to Europe comes with fewer crowds, far more comfortable temperatures in places that skew scorching hot during the summer months and plunging prices on airfare and accommodation.
Plunging prices
“The cheapest time to fly to Europe is typically from about the middle point of October to the middle point of December,” said Hayley Berg, lead economist at travel platform Hopper. “Airfare prices during those eight or nine weeks or so will typically be about an average of 40% lower than prices in the peak of summer in June.”
Hopper’s data shows that airfare to Europe from the United States during the period between October 20 and December 8 is averaging between $560 and $630 per ticket — down 9% from this time last year and 5% compared to the same timeframe in 2019.
Europe’s secret season for travel starts now
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Summer might be the most popular season for tourism to Europe, but it hardly promises a calm, cool and collected experience.
Who can forget this summer’s protests against overtourism in Barcelona and Mallorca, the wildfires that raged across Greece during the country’s hottest June and July on record and selfie stoplights to help control crowds on the clogged streets of Rome and Florence?
For travelers looking to avoid all that — as well as break less of a sweat literally and financially — welcome to Europe’s secret season.
https://kra18att.cc
kraken войти
From roughly mid-October to mid-December, shoulder season for travel to Europe comes with fewer crowds, far more comfortable temperatures in places that skew scorching hot during the summer months and plunging prices on airfare and accommodation.
Plunging prices
“The cheapest time to fly to Europe is typically from about the middle point of October to the middle point of December,” said Hayley Berg, lead economist at travel platform Hopper. “Airfare prices during those eight or nine weeks or so will typically be about an average of 40% lower than prices in the peak of summer in June.”
Hopper’s data shows that airfare to Europe from the United States during the period between October 20 and December 8 is averaging between $560 and $630 per ticket — down 9% from this time last year and 5% compared to the same timeframe in 2019.
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Greetings, earthlings! I’m Jackie Wattles, and I’m thrilled to be a new name bringing awe to your inbox.
I’ve covered space exploration for nearly a decade at CNN, and there has never been a more exciting time to follow space and science discoveries. As researchers push forward to explore and understand the cosmos, advancements in technology are sparking rapid developments in rocketry, astronomical observatories and a multitude of scientific instruments.
https://kra18att.cc
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Look no further than the missions racing to unlock dark matter and the mysterious force known as dark energy, both so named precisely because science has yet to explain these phenomena.
Astronomers have never detected dark matter, but they believe it makes up about 85% of the total matter in the universe. Meanwhile, the existence of dark energy helps researchers explain why the universe is expanding — and why that expansion is speeding up.
Extraordinary new scientific instruments are churning out trailblazing data, ready to reshape how scientists view the cosmos.
A prime example is the European Space Agency’s wide-angle Euclid telescope that launched in 2023 to investigate the riddles of dark energy and dark matter.
Euclid this week delivered the first piece of a cosmic map — containing about 100 million stars and galaxies — that will take six years to create.
These stunning 3D observations may help scientists see how dark matter warps light and curves space across galaxies.
Meanwhile, on a mountaintop in northern Chile, the US National Science Foundation and Stanford University researchers are preparing to power up the world’s largest digital camera inside the Vera C. Rubin Observatory.
Unearthed
In the mountains of Uzbekistan, a research team used lasers strapped to a flying robot to uncover two cities buried and lost for centuries.
The anthropologists said they had mapped these forgotten medieval towns for the first time — located at a key crossroad of ancient silk trade routes — using a drone equipped with LiDAR, or light detection and ranging equipment.
When nature reclaims what’s left of once thriving civilizations, scientists are increasingly turning to remote sensing to peer through dense vegetation.
The images revealed two large settlements dotted with watchtowers, fortresses, complex buildings, plazas and pathways that tens of thousands of people may have called home.
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