Take Back Your Power With Women

Senior Fingers (not to be confused with MR. Fingers), has this post up about how society skews our views of romance and relationships, and what we can do to fix that.

Senior Fingers writes:
After all the
analyzation of Social Distortion, the Feminization of Man and the
perceived power struggle of the sexes, I finally realized something…

Many of us are giving our power away to external influences and are left with none for ourselves.

Society

Our favorite scapegoat of all time. This is the classic bleeding heart logic at work…

"Oh its not HIS fault he murdered a small village..he was a troubled youth and is clinically insane..SOCIETY made him this way"

Or in most of the cases here…..

"Its not my fault I am intimidated by women. I was raised AFC! Society is fuct up!"

Well, its no secret we havent achieved utopia yet. But you will get no
closer to your goals by playing the Blame Game. Its one thing to
understand the root of your dysfunction and another to accept
responsibilty for it.

A brief tale to illustrate my point…

I used to run into this beggar on the subway all the time. I felt
really bad for him because he was about my age and only had one leg.
Whenever I saw him, I would give him whatever loose change I had. This
made me feel good, knowing that I had helped someone who was relatively
helpless. For months it was like this until one day everything changed.

I was walking down Houston street (one of the busiest intersections of
NYC) and saw this crazy messenger weaving in and out of traffic on his
bike and pulling some kamikazee manuevers. As a cyclist, I could
appreciate his skill and walked to the corner to get a better view of
this daredevil.

Well, much to my surprise, this guy was alot older than I though. His
grey beard indicated a man of middle age. Upon closer inspection I
couldnt believe what I saw. Yup, homeboy had ONE LEG! I had trremendous
respect for this man and will never forget him. You can guess what
happened next time I saw that bum on the subway. I didnt give him a
dime because I realized he wasnt as helpless as I had thought.

One man used his disability as an excuse to fail, another used it as a challenge to succeed. The difference is astronomical!

Nationalities and Generalizations

"Asian Chicks are the best!" "White Chicks are whГіres!" "English girls are cold!" "Stay away from black girls!!"

Yet again, more excuses.

"Its not really me, it is HER…damn these green-eyed/redheaded/etc girls!!"

It is much easier to blame our failures on a womans nationality, race
or appearance than to face the fact that we might be doing something
wrong.

Playing the victim will get you no closer to victory!

Brainwashing and the Media

"Feminists have taken over TV and film! Men are
being portrayed more and more weak and submissive! We are trapped in
the Matrix! Oh Noooo!"

What a load of BS! If you dont like what you see, then do what I did
and turn off your TV and stop whining. Personally I cant stand
television precisely because it is a parasite of my personal power. Why
spend time sitting in a pool of drool, thinking the exact same thoughts
as everyone else, when I could be writing a song or going for a run?
(Hell, I find that I enjoy chatting with you guys more than watching
these sh!tcoms anyday!)

The media is not doing a damn thing to you. It is YOU who are allowing
yourself to be influenced! Take responsibility for how you spend your
time and if you find yourself doing something that you feels is
weakening you on a subconscious level, then stop it! (duh!)

Women and Seduction

"Women have all the power! They use their sexuality as leverage in a nefarious power struggle against men!"

Wrong wrong wrong. People only have as much power over you as you give
them. Of course there are women who use their beauty to manipulate, but
what does this have to do with YOU?

Seduction is not a war against women. It really is more of a dance than
a competition. If there is any struggle involved, it is a battle for
empowerment within YOURSELF. Treating women like the enemy whose
defenses you must destroy will not get you very far!

Instead of thinking of this as a battle for power and dominance, think
of it as an opportunity to display your great personality and
confidence in order to genuinely connect with another human being.
Often times the straightforward approach is best.

Having said that, personally I have not had much luck just walking up
to girls and simply asking them out. (Unless there are some serious
signals, EC ,etc) Usually, I give them a reason (aside from my good looks) to WANT to go out with me.

This means being comfortable in my own skin, making entertaining
conversation and after displaying that I am a fun and interesting
person, I go precisely after what I want, (be it the digits or an
InstaDate)

At the end of the day this is a GIRL we are talking about here, not a trained soldier you must defeat!

Instead of giving women all the power, your attitude should be "Yeah
you are cute, but else you got going for ya?" In fact the whole purpose
of you asking her out is to screen her to see if she is worthy of YOU.
Not the other way around.

So often we fukk up by becoming starstruck and impressed by the fact
that a girl was born with good genes. Once again we give our power
away, this time to the random couplings of chromosomes!

Conclusion

Stop making excuses for yourself. Life is not fair and we all have to
play our best with the hand we are dealt. No sense in crying over a
lousy hand when you can simply make the most of it. You have much more
power than you probably give yourself credit for!

So whats it gonna be?

Are you the man who overcomes the obstacles and makes sh!t happen?
Or are you the chump who underestimates himself and makes excuses?

The most empowering fact of all is that the choice is yours, my friend.

Carpe diem.

I think the point Senior Fingers touches on here is a really powerful one.  It reminds me of that Doors lyric "People are strange, when you’re a stranger, faces look ugly, when you’re alone. Women seem wicked, when you’re unwanted, streets are lonely when you are gone."  Its tempting to resent that which you don’t have as a way of trying to make yourself feel better for not having it, so a lot of guys who feel they can’t get women end up hating women to try and justify not having one in their life.

And when they do break out of that mindset, they look at getting a woman as a task, something they have to do — an adversary they have to conquor.  I think what Senior Fingers said about seduction being more of a dance is actually quite true, because the woman you’re with has to be a part of the the process instead of just a cog in the machine.