“Reality” check.

A guy by the handle x-code wrote an interesting post in the General forum of mASF about the feasability of combining the NLP and PUA schools of thought into one all-encompassing system. Here’s what he had to say:

x-code writes:
What I have been thinking about recently … It seems that there are at least two PU ‘schools’. The first one is NLP-based and focuses on mirroring, eliciting values, trance words and patterning. The other one is more focused on improving the inner game, by becoming a highly valuable male whom women are ready to chase and pursue – ‘recognize that you are the prize’ to quote the signature of one of the regular posters.

No, I don’t mean one can completely disregard the inner game if he chooses the NLP/patterning route – AND I would like to warn some newbies who mistakenly think that learning trancing skills is enough for getting laid.

My point is rather how to combine both of the approaches to get better results. Can we, for example, become more desirable men by learning the patterning stuff and use our skills of controlling the women’s state as a REWARD rather than a tool?

I know I sound not that consistent, but these are my raw thoughts I’d like to share and discuss with you.

I thought Tyler had an interesting reply…

Tyler Durden writes:
Personally I base most of my game on how naturals do
it.

Like if you look at the naturals out at the clubs (you don’t see these often at all in North America, but you see them more often in Europe and Australia), they are shooting the shit with the girls, controlling the frame at all times, and having a great time. They’re also indifferent either way, and make the girls chase. But yet, they escalate and go sexual when the time is right.

This is exactly how I base my game. I’m just more conscious of everything that is going on, so I can blow out any natural because of my deliberate effort to understand, practise, and refine my game.

One of the big fallacies that guys make when they come to the community is thinking that certain tactics magically generate attraction, when game is really a combination of:

-controlling the frame
-being funny and raising emotions
-being someone they seek validation from
-being someone they think they could gain social status from being with
-adding energy to the interaction so that the chemistry takes off
-engaging the girls with almost a hyper focus, so that the interaction is fully charged (this naturally leads to phase shifting and sexuality -> think of your last AFC girlfriend, and how whenever you’d first talk it would have this sort of hyper focused *energy* where you were both just totally aware of eachother and your synpses were firing on all cylinders)
-having the manneurisms, bodylanguage, and vocal tonality of someone who is desired by women
-connecting at some point
-not triggering ASD by not saying anything stupid about what is going on

That is all that game really is man. It’s not complicated, but it takes practise.

Have a plan, go in, and take the fuck over. Do it over and over, until you master it. Love the process for itself, in the same way you’d love surfing. The ride is fun whether you make it to the shore or not, and with every wave you jump on you learn more and more. The fact that you don’t make it in every time is what makes it addictive, because the prospect that you might at any point entices you to keep going again and again.

You can read the whole post here.

The more I get into this stuff, and the more field experience I get, the more I believe beyond any shadow of a doubt that controlling the frame is the single most important factor to being successful with women. I think all the stuff Tyler listed in his post above is part of how to control the interaction with the woman to make you as attractive as possible.

I’ve had a lot of good success with talking to girls by running one routine after another on them. There is a school of thought on talking to the woman, asking her questions, and letting her talk about herself, but I’m finding that though that may get you results, what that does is it sucks you into your target’s reality and allows them to set the frame within which the interaction takes place, and any success with her at that point comes from manipulating her frame to accepting you.

When I see some really amazing field guys work, they do not do this. In fact, very rarely do they ask questions (and when they do, it’s part of a preplanned routine). Instead, they control the conversation by their use of stories and routines. They get the girl to ask THEM questions, and that not only raises their value, but it also sucks the girl into their reality and sets a frame where THEY are in control, instead of the girl. In a way, I feel this is a more powerful tactic because you eliminate the subtle manipulation of someone else’s thoughts and feelings, and instead overwhelm them with your own.

In a way, I think that’s an easier way to do things.