Becoming a Mercenary

Dimitri has a rather excellent post up on the General board of mASF where he extrapolated a rather interesting concept from the MrSex4uNYC archive (I still gotta read that “Best Of” post, damnit!!!). Anyway, he has this to say…

Dimitri writes:
On one last note, MrSex4uNYC settled another thing for me that I’d wrestled with in the past: I went from near always accepting a woman’s frame to near always rejecting a woman’s frame to a certain balance in between, now. I understand why I do this and why it works more.

In his post, NYC talks about always being a leader unless a better leader is around. If there is one, he doesn’t become a follower, he becomes a *mercenary*. For me (in other words, this is my interpretation) he’s working with the other person for as long as he’s getting what he wants, but when he’s not getting “paid” any more, he’s off to the highest bidder again, or working alone. That’s my new modus operandi. I’m in charge of myself until what someone else is doing is better for me. In that case, I’m behind them as long as it’s furthering my cause.

That idea in the above paragraph is now my own… NYC didn’t write the first part verbatim, nor did he extrapolate like I did. It’s my interpretation of how it’s going to be, and how it’s been becoming. Now I can articulate the attitude I’ve been ever-more becoming, and having the words for it is glorious.

And I get the added bonus of being a “Mercenary” now! How fucking sweet is that? “Mercenary Dimitri”… next time a woman asks what I do, I’m going to say I’m a Mercenary. Matter o’ fact, I used to use this as a stock response a while back. “I’m for sale to the highest bidder…” I wonder why I stopped using that…

Oh well. Anyway, yeah, I’ve gone off on a tangent, but my original idea: Leadership. Be in control of *yourself* and what you keep you around yourself. You can’t control a woman, but you can control how much she is around you, how much she affects you, and how much of yourself you’ll share with her. For me, accepting another frame or another’s leadership is acceptable, no… it’s correct, if working with that person I am better able to achieve my own goals. And MrSex4uNYC seems like a really badass guy.

I like that idea, because it reframes situations where you’re with your wingman. Instead of being subserviant or beta to your buddy, you can be more of a hired gun. Plus, I like the part about telling the girl “I’m for sale to the highest bidder.” lol.

The whole thread can be checked out here.