Dandy Lion

**Reposted from the first Lair, original date: 1/12/04

Just a quick thought I had after I wrote my post on taboos.  I got to thinking about how some of the other seducers and PUAs out there use taboos to pick up women, and I got to thinking about Tyler Durden.  For those of you who don’t know, I’m not talking about the Fight Club guy, I’m talking about our favorite little Canadian PUA who’s out there teaching workshops to the masses looking to get laid.

The thing about Tyler (and many other PUAs in the community) is that he can be easily mistaken for a gay man.  He’s adopted so many chick mannerisms and “Dandy” qualities, that he just comes off a fem and homosexual.  Yet he is incredibly good with picking up women.  However, and Tyler will tell you this himself, he often has difficulty with girls flaking on him or leaving after the initial lay.  Obviously, this is a part of his game that he’s working on, but coupled with my post on taboos, it got me wondering.

Basically, in our society, homosexuality is a taboo.  It’s often frowned upon and unaccepted, and because of this it garners a certain appeal, especially with women, who’s nurturing nature makes them more open to homosexuality.  And I think seducers like Tyler and other Dandy’s often play off this in their pick-ups.  Not only do the exhibit qualities of homosexual men, but they also exhibit mannerisms and attitudes of women.  So in a way, they are appealing to two taboos – that of the female fantasy of seducing a homosexual man, and that of sleeping with another female.

And it apparently works.  Tyler does in fact get laid, and he is very good at picking up women.  But it’s all in a club atmosphere, which often helps people to give into their desire to shirk taboos.  I’m thinking that once those girls get back to their real lives, however – lives where they are judged by their peers, where they have jobs, etc.  That the taboos become reinforced and this causes the girls to lose any attraction they may have had for someone like Tyler.

This is interesting for me, because I’m wondering if this is a typical problem of the Dandy.  Many androgynous men often appeal to the same taboos, but seem to be able to keep their women around.  I’m wondering if that’s because the taboos they seem to be shirking aren’t as obvious.  Either way, I’d be curious to hear other people’s thoughts on this topic.

Thundercat