Worst. Sex Advice. Ever.
August 24, 2010 by Thundercat
Filed under Rants & Reviews
You know, sometimes I stumble across a piece of advice that is so freakin’ bad, I can’t believe anybody would bother posting it. I mean, seriously…
MrXXX writes:
While recieving oral/sex just bust out your phone and start browsing, text someone etc. Shit you don’t even need to do anything. The idea is to focus your mind on anything that is not pleasure, by doing so you are blocking the mental part of the orgasm and thus you cannot cum. If the female asks why you are busting your phone just tell her “cause I want to fucking last longer” “cause i fucking can” “so I cant last longer”. etc….Thats it. Just do it. If it does not work your dumb as shit.
Actually, if you TAKE MrXXX’s advice, you’re dumb as shit. I mean, where do I even begin with this…
First off, if you take out your phone and start texting someone while getting a BJ, that’s probably gonna be the LAST BJ you ever get from that girl. Women give me shit about checking my phone while out on a DATE (some say its disrespectful) so I can just imagine how they’d react if I did that during sex. I mean, what girl wouldn’t get pissed off if she was going down on you and you’re texting someone or looking at your phone? I’ll tell you this – any girl who sees that happen is going to instantly think the guy isn’t into them, feel massively insecure, and STOP what they’re doing. I can almost guarantee that.
Secondly, why the hell do you want to last longer during a blowjob? During sex, yes, I can understand you’d want to increase endurance, but that’s because of your partner’s pleasure, right? Lasting long during a blowjob doesn’t do anyone any good. The girl doesn’t want to be down there all day! In fact, if you take TOO long, she’s going to think something is wrong. Plus, why would you want to deny yourself pleasure? That’s what sex is all about, right? Allow yourself to enjoy it!
If you REALLY need help here, blow your load fast during the BJ, then you’ll last longer during sex. No phone or mental torture required.
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이번에는 증기 기관차 옆에서 렌치를 들고 있는 것은 Zhu Houzhao였습니다.
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Sheng Jia는 이미 멀리 떨어져 있었고 Fang Jifan은 말을 타고 따라 잡았습니다.
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그러나 지금 어린 왕자는 살의를 품은 듯한 맹렬한 눈빛을 하고 있었다.
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Liu Jian과 다른 사람들은 폐하의 불안을 보는 것 같았지만 어떤 징후도 보이지 않았습니다.
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일부는 Franji의 배에서 약탈당했습니다.
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“당신의 서클에 진정한 혼란”과 같은 용어가있을 것은 후대에있을 것입니다.
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대체 뭐야, 어디서 그렇게 많은 것들이 나왔어.
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다시 스 와이프 : “태강 공주님은 제 이모입니다.”
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내시는 여전히 자리를 뜨지 않고 침을 꿀꺽 삼키며 말하기를 주저했다.
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“오, 도와줘… 도와줘, 불타고 있어…”
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모든 종류의 의심은 그들로 하여금 큰 일이 일어날 수 있음을 깨닫게 했습니다.
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Xiao Jing은 “예, 폐하의 말씀이 옳습니다. “라고 이해하는 척 고개를 끄덕였습니다.
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여기…Fang Jifan은 그에게 박수를 보낼지 말지 몰랐습니다!
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이 소문을 만든 팡지판의 마음이 갑자기 뒤집어졌다.
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“계속해.” Fang Jifan은 마음 속으로 조용히 생각했습니다.
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초등학생 1319: 나도 대리인이면 어때
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