Bead P: The Newbie Catch 22

March 2, 2010 by BradP
Filed under Brad P

For Newbies, It’s A Catch 22

This article is for guys who want to learn pickup but are too afraid to go into the field. If you’re already good at pickup, don’t bother with this one.

After teaching pickup for the last 5 years, I’ve seen my fair share of guys who read pickup tips and then don’t try any of it. It’s the paramount problem that prevents people from improving.

For some guys, there’s a vicious cycle going on.

They can’t get women because they don’t have a lot of balls.

The won’t get any balls until they go into the field.

They can’t go into the field because they’re too scared of what might happen.

So the process of learning can’t ever begin, because in order to learn pickup, you must spend many hours in the field.

It’s a catch 22. You need the fear to go away so you can go in field, but the fear won’t go away until you go in field.

A lot of newbies are caught in this catch 22. They begin to feel that the field is an unattainable goal, and the only thing that might help their game is to read and study some more.

The bad news is that you can’t read and study your way into a girl’s pants. This isn’t grad school. Memorizing a bunch of theories won’t get you very far.

Furthermore, all of that reading moves many students backwards when it’s done with no field time (see The Forbidden Truth).

The solution to this issue is to make the field more attainable to newbies. In order to get to this goal, we’ll have to go against a few of the core pickup values temporarily.

So if you feel like you’re caught in this catch 22, I want you to suspend disbelief for a moment. This isn’t about finding a perfect 10 and cold approaching her and seducing her for a same night lay. You’ll have to work your way up to that. For now, it’s better to start with much smaller goals.

The first goal is to be able to function and be comfortable in a night life environment.

The second goal is to be able to have a conversation with someone in a night life environment.

The third goal is to be able to talk to a woman or group of women for a good 10 minutes without getting negative or nervous.

If you can do that, you’ve made a small step towards seducing the super hotties you’ve got your eye on. But first things first.

In order to make this extremely easy and attainable, I’d like to turn you on to some of the easiest places to socialize. If you’re advanced, or you already have normal social skills, you can skip the rest of this article. This is purely for the guys who are sitting home reading because they are too scared to go out and meet women.

Here are the 2 easiest settings to socialize in:

1- BBW Parties

What’s a BBW, you might ask? Well it’s a politically correct term for “fat chick.” BBW stands for “big beautiful woman.” There are organizations that throw weekly or month parties for BBWs and their gentleman admirers.

The rejection rate is very low at this kind of event. You don’t have to be good at pickup at all. You don’t have to use any lines or techniques, just show up and start talking off the top of your head and you’ll be fine.

I’m not saying you have to date these women or have sex with them, but you can talk with them so you get used to being in the presence of a woman.

In many ways, they respond the same way a normal woman would respond. So it’s really good practice. If you can get good at gaming BBWs, it’s a small leap to being able to game average girls. Who knows, you might even feel some connection or spark with a woman, or make some good friends.

They have these parties all over the country. Just type your zip code and “BBW party” into Google and you’ll see what I mean. Here’s an example- www.clubbounce.net

2- Goth Clubs

The Goth scene is full of people who have trouble socializing and want to break out of this issue and build relationships with others like themselves. In some ways it’s inspirational. The Goths have turned social isolation into a virtue.

People in the goth scene are extremely friendly and accepting of others. They will talk to anyone, no matter how awkward they may be. Many Goths are overcoming social awkwardness themselves, and the goth scene is a safe haven for them to develop their social skills.

You don’t have to look like a goth or dress like a goth to go to a goth club. They’re not the kind of people who would exclude you based on what you’re wearing. Many people who go to goth clubs are 9 to 5 office worker types. Goth clubs have a lot of people who don’t “look the part.”

The best part is that even if you spend the whole night scared and sulking in the corner by yourself, that actually makes you pretty cool by goth standards.

The bonus is that you also get the occasional super hot goth chick in a corset and pigtails. That will brighten your day.

Even if you’re scared to death of social situations, you’ll probably do OK in these 2 settings.

I hope this helps you make the first small step towards becoming more social.

-Brad P.

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