How To Win Arguments With Women

Its one of the biggest questions men everywhere have – how do you win arguments with women?  Well, it seems long time poster Neo-Rio over on mASF may have found a pretty good formula for doing so.

Check it out…

Neo-Rio writes:
Hi everyone, it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything of value here. So today i jsut want to talk about something very personal close to my heart.

"How to win arguments with women consistently."

Where do I start explaining this one in detail?

Well, for the past few years or so, I’ve been having a string of 10 new girls per year – and I’ve built up quite a little following of regular girls who I have nothing but a great time with, and we never fight or argue about anything. In many ways, I really dislike drama, and personally I’d be pretty heartbroken if I ever had to yell or scream at ANYBODY, especially one that I care about. Personally, I see myself as a very satisfied, relaxed, chilled-out person who wouldn’t get angry over anything – so if I ever was to get pushed to the point of having to yell and scream at the opposite sex who I really love – I think I’d just chew myself up.

So to that end, I have a personal rule which has worked really REALLY well for me, and has ensured that my relationships with women are harmonious and without any drama, and as much fun as possible:

IF I EVER HAVE TO ARGUE OR RAISE MY VOICE WITH ANY WOMAN – THAT WOMAN IS GONE FOREVER.

This has worked for me because of the following reasons:-

1) Fun-loving women who are cool and peaceful are my type of woman. There are never any arguments with this type, because they are typically smart as well, and any disagreements can be solved easily with a simple discussion. Once you are used to enjoying being with this kind of woman, you will also start expecting similar behaviour from other women too. This has a run-on effect with all women you meet in your life as they immediately pick up on how to treat you.

2) This little rule has made sure that I do MY BEST not to get angry at women, because I know that the minute I do get angry – I won’t ever be talking to her again. In essence it has made me a lot happier and tolerant of other people, which helps me in other areas of my life as well. Dale Carnegie in his classic book "How to win friends and influenceВ» people" has a chapter on arguments, and basically sums up the solution to them as to avoid ever having them. You’ll do well to take that advice too.

3) Women will typically only argue with you when they DO NOT RESPECT you. This can often occur on the approach (as a defensive club/bar tactic – requiring NEGs) or in a relationship of some kind. Many of you may be familiar with couples who break up and get back together again. DO NOT DO THIS. If a woman disrespects you enough to even RISK having an argument with you, when you have done your best to approach problems calmly and in a rational manner – EVEN IF you manage to "kiss and make up" you are now in a much WEAKER position than you were with her BEFORE she pulled this shit. It’s MANIPULATION, pure and simple. Women who argue typically rely on fighting with men as a form of getting attention. If they can drag you into a fight and get you pissed off and invested in an argument, they stand a chance of getting your full attention. That shit is just plain selfish. What’s more if they can BREAK you and have you submit to their demands, they’ll argue ALL THE MORE because they KNOW they can pull this shit again and get what they want. That’s even more selfish and you DON’T deserve it.

4) The fact that I am nice and kind all the time to the women I love means that most women have NEVER seen me when I’m angry. I aim to keep it that way. Since they enjoy spending time with me – they do their best to ensure that they NEVER get me mad either. The fact that they do NOT know what I am capable of when I am pissed means that they are SCARED SHITLESS of ever pushing me close to that point.

This brings me to my next point – what to do when you find yourself arguing with a woman:-

Simply speaking, all you have to do is EXPLAIN, DEMAND AN APOLOGY, and if that’s not forthcoming then EJECT. If you were in a relationship with her before, it is absolutely CRITICAL that you end it and MOVE ON too.

EXPLAIN to the woman that, NO, you aren’t going to argue with her. It’s disrespectful to you. You won’t accept it. Whatever relationship you had with her is OVER, and you aren’t going to talk to her EVER again until you get a FULL APOLOGY.
You don’t need to get angry yourself – you just need to leave her something to think about when you are GONE.

Make her APOLOGIZE. If anything this is a big compliance test. If you ever needed to know how much respect this woman actually has for you – this is IT. If you get an apology and she goes back to talking like a normal, rational human being – then ACCEPT IT.
Don’t accept a half-assed apology either. If she says something like "I’m sorry, but you started it" or some other nonsense, that is NOT an apology. Nothing other than a FULL acceptance of blame is an apology.

OTHERWISE if she can’t do this, here is the PROOF that she doesn’t give a shit about you and she doesn’t respect you – in which case you EJECT AND DON’T LOOK BACK. Just up and leave. DO NOT be tempted to argue back to her IT WILL NOT WORK. The longer you stay around her when there is a bad vibe between you, the more she will mentally associate you with a BAD TIME. You instead want her to associate being with you as a constant GOOD TIME and for her to associate getting angry with you to LONELINESS. She will now have nobody to yell at then, and at that point it ceases to be fun for her – and you win the argument.

ALWAYS REMEMBER that you must SHOW A WILLINGNESS TO WALK with woman at ALL TIMES. Without this, you, as a man, are TOAST.
To match this, you have to build your social skillset to the point where you can meet new women all the time and REPLACE women who aren’t going to behave. You can’t tell women what to do any more than they can tell you what to do – BUT you can ALWAYS meet new women, or at least have a good time in the process.

If you happen to be one of these married men (or single men for that matter) living with a woman who makes a point of arguing and yet you don’t want to get a messy divorce – the ONLY way you can get this ability to walk back is to separate and go find yourself a bachelor pad. Start living the bachelor life again. Start seeing multiple girlfriends. Yes it’s going to be hard at first, but you need to go through with this to get your balls back. THEN once she finally realises what she has done and APOLOGIZES, you will come and visit – for a while. However, I strongly recommend keeping that pad and NOT moving back in with her no matter how much she begs for it.
(Personally I don’t even think it’s a good idea to be a playboy and have a live-in girlfriend – having been there and done that and wasted a few years of my life in such an arrangement – considering I am FAR more happier now having a number of girlfriends at-call to come over for some loving, and the ability to send them home when I need time away from them.)

There are going to be some guys out there stuck in these unhappy relationships thinking "But I REALLY love this woman and no matter how many times we fight we’re still together, and I still want to be with her!". Well SORRY. I have been there before too and it just DOESN’T WORK that way. If you have followed this progression of what to do when you get into an argument – then you should have ALREADY ESTABLISHED that she DOESN’T RESPECT YOU when she failed to apologize. In which case, go give yourself an uppercut and harden the fuck up.

I’M SERIOUS. NEVER PLACATE WOMEN when they argue and NEVER kiss and make up. Even if you do, she will pull shit again at a later date. You should NEVER EVER be arguing with a woman IN THE FIRST PLACE, and there are women out there who don’t have anger management issues. Go find them and rid yourself of angry women. Life is to short to waste on second-best. You deserve better.

Anyway, this simple philosophy has saved me a LOT of mental pain and anguish, and all my relationships with women are happy. Sure, a few argumentative women fell by the wayside from being stupid and trying to mess with me – but I consider it a filtering mechanism – and the pain was over really quickly because I cut them off REALLY quick and never looked back. Sometimes relationships with women have a life-span and you have to be aware when one has run it’s course. When that happens, you might find yourself in an argument and recognizing that its time for her to move on, and for you to find more women!

Enjoy many fun and flirtatious women in your life!… and remember…. getting angry is like picking up a hot coal to throw at someone. It serves no purpose because you’ll only burn yourself first before you ever get to throw it!

PS. I mentioned earlier on that sometimes (typically in bars/clubs etc.) you will meet women who will pull shit on you to test you. These women are handled the same way as I described here.
What is useful to say is : "What the hell are you doing at a social place and talking to people like that for (or ignoring them as the case may be). If you aren’t here to meet people, why not just GO HOME?"
This comment (especially if others hear it) will simply blow her out of the whole bar/club/event, because it’s very hard to argue against. If the chick was simply shit-testing you, she will immediately apologize.
I could go on about defensive blocks and establishing boundaries of acceptance with women, but that would require another huge post.

I would say its dangerous to try and apply logic to arguing with women.  In my experience, women defy ALL logic when arguing.

I don’t agree with Neo’s "take no prisoner" approach to this.  If you’re in a relationship with a girl, and you get into an argument, that relationship wont last too long if you follow Neo’s guidelines above.  I think his guidelines are pretty good for girls you just MET and are pulling bitch-tests on you.  But if you have a serious disagreement with a girl you’re close to, pulling Rio’s tactics are only going to get you in worse trouble.

At least IN MY experience.

I prefer the "surrender" tactic when it comes to these types of situations.  I actually got this from Robert Green’s 33 Strategies of War.  This is a strategy where you surrender to a stronger enemy force and then work to undermine him from within.

If you have an argument with a woman, no matter how wrong she is, allow her to "win."  That’s really the only way you’re going to get through it.  Face it – women will fight dirty to win an argument.  If they’re wrong or they’re losing, they’ll pull out something completely unrelated that yo ARE wrong about and make the argument about that.

When this happens, I just like to take the passive aggressive approach.  Tell her "okay, you win."  then go off and do what you were going to do anyway.  Afterwords, ask for her forgiveness.  That usually works pretty well.

Keep in mind – this tactic is for those "occasional" fights in a relationship.  If she’s a constant nagger, or you two are fighting all the time, then Neo’s tactic might be the way to go.  Either that or a straight break-up.