Women Who Cheat On Their Husbands
May 25, 2005 by Thundercat
Filed under Rants & Reviews
On an anti-marriage site (appropriately enough named "nomarriage.com") they have an article up about all the married women who love to cheat on their poor husbands which I thought was quite interesting…
Women Who Cheat Say They Enjoy the Thrills, Study Finds
Posted July 14, 2003 — Virtually all of the adulterous women interviewed in a recent survey said they cheat because
they deserve all of the pleasure and thrills associated with a secret affair.Ninety percent of the cheating wives said they suffered absolutely "no guilt" but felt "entitled" to the good feelings
they got, according to Susan Shapiro Barash, a professor and author, who randomly interviewed 120 women from a
diversity of professional backgrounds, ages and races for a recent book on the issue.She posted ads in YWCAs to find women who were sexually active, according the report on her study in The New York Post.
She said her research reveals that six in ten women will cheat on their husband at least once during their marriages.
"Women feel entitled because they’re not getting what they need in marriage," said Barash, who wrote A Passion for
More: Wives Reveal the Affairs that Make or Break their Marriages. "These women would recognize her need – her desire
to have more in her life than she had in her marriage. "For the women who choose it, it’s with great effort, so they
really juggle the affair and somehow fit it in."Baltimore psychologist Shirley Glass agrees with Barash.
"I don’t see women feeling a lot of guilt," said Glass, in her recent book, Not Just Friends: Protect Your Relationship
from Infidelity and Heal the Trauma of Betrayal . Women with careers and financial resources can take more risks, she
added: "If their partners find out, they can take care of themselves."But Barash has her dissenters. "I have not witnessed a growing experience of ‘entitlement.’ Their conscience is
bothering them," Kristen Harrington, a marriage counselor in upstate New York, told the Post .Glass also found surprising changes in men who mess around.
She said that men’s affairs tend to be almost exclusively about sex; they’re usually just getting "a little on the
side" with a female subordinate."Now, men and women are working together as equals, with a lot of intellectual energy and common interests," Glass
said. "It’s a combination of emotional and sexual bonds. And it’s more dangerous because it creates an alternative to
the marriage, rather than just a supplement."Still, being equal in some ways hasn’t erased the differences in why men and women cheat, some experts say.
"Men have affairs to boost their self-esteem and because it’s available. Their feelings are closely tied to their
sexuality and potency," Brooklyn psychologist Marcella Bakur Weiner said. "Women don’t just want a night of joy and
pleasure. No matter what the feminists say, women want love. They want emotional attachment and bonding."
It’s funny, because we all know that women are driven by emotion. They’re emotional junkies, which means that any man who can get their good emotions flowing is going to be able to sleep with them, and according to this article, the women for the most part have no guilt about it!
I think this kind of thing can be both very enlightening and very disturbing.
Enlightening because it means that just because a woman is married, doesn’t mean she’s off the market.
And disturbing because it means that just because a woman is married, doesn’t mean she’s off the market!
Often times, when people get married, there’s this idea that they’re going to stay true and faithful to each other for the rest of their lives, and the sad, sad truth of the matter is that this type of commitment can be very rare!
I’m not saying all women cheat on their husbands, but I do think that most women are inclined to do so if they’re not being satisfied emotionally or sexually by their husbands. In fact, I kind-of touch ont his subject with this month’s interview with Masterclass over on SeductionLair.com where he talks about how he picks up married women, and that if you know how to please a woman she’ll be incredibly loyal to you for as long as you want. (in fact, the sexual conditioning techniques he outlines pretty much give you a step-by-step method to make sure she never cheats on you — ever!)
Thanks to David for pointing this one out.
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i was out with a group of friends not last friday but the one before. a friend of a friend was there with his wife who he introduced me to. i did a couple of pau tricks: back turning breaking rapport etc speaking to her husband, dhv in other words not to pull her(honestly), just to establish a position in the group. the people i was out with were pretty high status in terms of the uk media. this woman (who is really attractive) was flirting like crazy trying to sit on my knee, not letting go of my arm etc.and several times i pulled my arm away and moved away. (just for the record i wasn t doing any C&f or flirting) i was really embarassed cos i did nt want the husband that i want to do business with in the future to think i was trying it on with his wife( or anyone else that was there for that matter). at 10pm he grabbed her dragging her off me and loudly announced we re going! they ve only been married a year and i agree with thundy its quite bad really cos this guy had earlier been telling me about how proud he was about his wife and blatatly shes up for the ride with anyone who s a bit more exciting edgy, alpha whatever you want to call it. and i don t claim to be the most attractive guy in london but it makes me never want to get married!!
In my personal experience, ALL women (married or with boyfriends)have a constant need for THREE things: Distraction, Escape, and Adventure.
They seek distraction from whatever stress they are going through at any given time. We guys have a need to attack the stress, and the source of that stress. Where as women simply want to be distracted from having to dwell on it. This is usually why married women will flirt with some guy who’s approached her. She is actively distracting herself from her typical life. it rarely, if EVER, results in an affair. It’s rare, because she is satisfied just being distracted, she’s not seeking anything more. She will give some guy her time, she will talk to him for a little while. But he is nothing more than a distraction, so she attaches nothing more to the encounter.
Then there is “Escape.” Women love escape. Be it escape from the stress, escape from the mundane, escape from the predictable, whatever. This is the NUMBER ONE reason why women will first consider having an affair. It usually doesn’t start out as an active decision to have an affair. Instead it starts out, using ine example, Hubby/Borefiend is watching the game/doing something she’s not into, so she’ll go out with some girlfriends. Yes, she enjoys her girlfriends and the things she does with them, but it’s powered mainly by a need to escape on some level from the relationship. Even if only for a few hours. It has NOTHING to do with if she loves him or not, and EVERYTHING to do with being in a situation that fills that emotional void, in whatever level that void may be. This is the reason why most women who have affairs, met their lover while out with her girlfriends, instead of when she was putting gas in the car, or on lunch break at work. She is seeking an escape, and he came along while she was having that “escape” emotion. She will rarely make it known in front of her girlfriends that she is thinking of having an affair with the man. It does happen, but it’s not very common. But she WILL find a way to get his phone number (For example, she might offer to go to the bar to get everyone a drink. And while in route to the bar she is looking for him, so she can approach him and ultimately get his contact info)
An “escape” affair is the most common of all affairs, I have found. These are the affairs that take place in as much privacy as possible. Like meeting at a hotel room, or miles from anyone she knows, spotting them together. These are the affairs where a woman feels completely content with BOTH men. These are also the affairs where women feels little or no guilt about the affair. In HER mind, she’s still in love with her husband, she just likes what things the affair adds to the quality of her life. The funny thing is, she is both attached AND detached from her affair lover. She is attached, in regard to having a need to indulge in the experiences she has with him. But she’s detached, in that she’s not in love with him. He’s either “just sex” or he’s an extention of the life she feels most fulfilled by. She can leave the affair with no problem, because she never placed any expectatiosn on it lasting forever.
Then you have the “adventure”
If you can bring a woman into your reality, and bombared her with emotional and physical pleasure beyond what she’s used to, you are creating an adventure in her mind. Women are adventure junkies, so even if she felt completely satisfied by Hubby before you walked into her life, she is STILL going to go along with you if you spark that quiver of potential adventure inside of her. They love the experience of the aggressive stranger who takes them by the hand, pulls them into the darkened hallway, and gives them that exciting, yet “forbidden” kiss, before she feels his fingers inside of her, and upon her climax he just walks away from her.
They love joining you at some club, and having you pull them out of that club, only to take them to another one, and then another one, and then pulling her into the bathroom for some oral pleasures.
They love meeting you secrectly someplace, only to discover that your plans to take them shopping turns out to be you whisking her across the stateline to some mall 50 miles away, where afterwards she can been seen out in the open, at some softly lit restaurant as she sips a Merlot, and the hours melt away and that exciting “danger” of not being able to get home before Hubby arrives from work.
THESE are the affairs that women DREAM of! They can have a stranger’s cock inside of them, they know this, so it holds little sense of adventure. But when she gets that stranger’s cock after he’s overwhelmed her with experiences and moments that she rarely, if ever, gets to have with Hubby, she’s hooked! She will finance the entire affair if she has to, just to keep the adventure going on. She will risk quite a bit to continue the affair, while at the same time enjoying the infrequency of their time together. She wil fly 2,000 away just to get her ass plugged by him, and catch the red eye back home, all the while telling Hubby it was a sick girlfriend of hers that she’s going to visit in Las Vegas.
These are things she does not get with Hubby/Borefiend, so they are wonderful adventures that she otherwise only gets to experience in romance novels and daytime television. And THESE are the affairs she never feels guilty about, because she sees them as “once in a lifetime experiences” that she feels she deserves.
Bishop
“Unleash What’s Within You”
http://www.new-alpha.com
“Unleash What She’s Been Waiting For”
http://www.new-alpha.com/fos.html
Yea, Thunder, thank you…
I think it’s important to stay strong on this great thoughts and realities…
I didn’t know there were “anti-marriage” sites… thanks for informing that… cause I didn’t know…
Bishop, how scared should married men be on a scale of 1-10 that you know THAT much about cheating wives?
In response to “JB” who wrote:
“Bishop, how scared should married men be on a scale of 1-10 that you know THAT much about cheating wives?
”
If they visit/live in Las Vegas: 11
But what should scare them even more, is that I’M A FUGLY GUY who knows that much about cheating wives. LOL
I found out my partner cheated me some time ago. Although she didn’t feel guilty while she was having these sexual romps, she knew I was on to her. She ended them in order to keep our family together. I went through a whole variety of emotions for the next little while. We where recently involved in a high speed accident. she remains convinced that my actions behind the wheel saved all our lives. Personally, I think it was pure luck. But I can’t help think back, what if I let go of the steering wheel. Maybe we wouldn’t have survived. Then I wouldn’t have to worry about anything anymore.
I came to a descision recently. This affair thing wasn’t going to go away. So, I went to the other man’s place and beat the living sh*t out of him. I think I mentioned to him if he ever came anywhere near my wife, I’d bury his……
Anyways, you get the point. Oddly enough, it doesn’t bother as much anymore. Guess I should have done that a long time ago.
Best of luck…
Trevor wrote:
“So, I went to the other man’s place and beat the living sh*t out of him.”
If you’re telling the truth, you’re an idiot who ought to be in prison. For the sake of your daughter, go turn yourself in.
If you’re making it up, you’re merely an idiot.
I was happily married – eveything was perfect. Then he knocked at the door, he was my husbands opposite, crude, un educated, boisterous, drank beer, bad manners, everything I would never marry. “need to borrow some milk” really that old line. He was the neighbor across the street. Once inside he came as close to me as he could with out touching. Tall he looked down and grinned. He took my hand and pulled it to the bulge in his jeans. He was huge. I fell into him, inot his arms and I was a goner. He stunk of sweat, but it sent me mad with lust, like it filled my head. I was terrified – my own home what if my husband came home early. For the firt time in my life my body had an agenda separate from my brain. His arm went inside the back of my t shirt and in one move he had me stripped to my waist, then his hand sliped under the band of my panties and his hand was deep inside me. I exploded, qivered..I thought I had had an orgasam before. Noooo I hadn’t. My jeans around my ankles he crudly fucked em up against the refrigerator. It was hard and he called me names like ” does my nieghbors sweet little wife like cheating on her wimp husband” then He ordered me to fuck him back..I could believe what idid…I started working to make sure he though I was a good fuck. I never though musch about if my husband thought I was good. He pound into and even slapped me around. I could stop convulsing. I was scared to death If I got caught I would loose everything..It was the thrill of getting away with it…it went on with him for 13 years and my husband never knew. I have my sophistacted nice good provider with all the status and a good dad for my kids, then I had a real may to satisfy my need for excitment and quick thrills. Just like he never knew I screwed two other neighbors, my tennis coach a stranger at a local Cheveron Station and the constuction worker that screwed me regularly in the back of my mini van after I dropped the kids at school. For me it was the thrill of outsmarting my husband and having the secret from hi
Beware of serial bully husbands.
Those guys are really incredible.
There are various kinds of those who generate sh!t in their family, and their
family members do not know why.
Those will have target a child in their
family who either (or a combination of
the following):
1) Force them to follow a profession their
child do not want.
2) Observe them secretly in various ways.
3) Feel jealous about their target.
4) Very often accuse them insanely about
things.
and the list goes on. People may do not
realize that they are bullied for YEARS
until it comes the day of enlightment.
Families with parent a bully and child
with psychological problem (the child
is going to be obsessed maybe) can happen.
Read some of “serial bully” articles on the net.
Those guys absolutely suck as wussies…
(My first language is not English, sorry)
You people are clueless. Women stray for the EXACT same reaons men stray : Sex and excitement. Today, women feel entitled to it. And why not? Men have always felt it was their perogative to cheat. Now the playing field has been leveled. I regularly hear men complaining about thier impotent sex lives – how the wife isn’t interested in sex. Here is the absolute truth: Women are just as interested in sex as men are. If your wife/girlfriend isn’t having sex with you it’s because she isn’t interested in you anymore. All the talk of personal trainers who say that these women are lonely blah blah blah…that’s only the story women are feeding them for sympathy. Make no bones about it, women are in it for sex.
Some of you people have uttered good shit.
Some of you have uttered stupid shit.
And some a combination of both. LOl.
And it is deffinitly true that women are in it for the same reasons men are, sex and excitement. Those female psychologists really threw some shit in that article about how women wan’t love and connection blah blah blah.
All to often people make women out as angelic figures who don’t ever have to feel guilty about the things they do. Men get frowned upon for everything.
Only reason this happens, is because women make society more money. As a matter of fact it goes even deeper then that. Society is also structered in a sence that women can make society more money.
Eventually men and women are ver much the same, both human. It’s the physical characteristics that mostly created and still support the illusion of a big difference between men and women.
This all started since the beginning of human evolution, and it is all based on the automatic roles that males and females instinctivily took back then.
Man strong, man big, man go out and get food from dangerous things.
Woman small, woman weak, woman stay safe and take care of childeren and do… nothing..
These instinctive roles still reflect on modern day life. And they also cause extra conflict because some people have evolved faster and better then others. These people want to evolve further by leaving behind ancient old roles that are not neccesary anymore. But the bigger part of society isen’t up for this.
These kinds of conflicts create identity crisis, and a variety of other psychological disorders.
The reason why a man will usually feel more guilty and a woman won’t, is because a man is still caught in the role of strong provider, and women are still caught in the role of weaker/ fairer sex (victim).
Nowadays these things are very irrelevant, women nowadays can fend for themselves much easier. You don’t need so much physical strength nowadays as mental strength.
Money is power now not muscle. Accompanying this is the increase of logical thinking from both species, this results in natural paranoia.
(Ain’t life peachy? HIHI!)
It’s like every man and woman for themselves.
One big mistake men make nowadays is thinking that women still need them to provide. Like the AFC who tries to buy a womans attention and supplicate to her.
One big mistake women make nowadays is thinking that only they have been, can be, and are victims.
Those two thingy’s create a nice little circle if you try and connect them together. Make an effort, you’ll see what I mean.
The Darkchild
wow!!
is it really true? that’s why my x wife never bother to say sorry..
Trevor, I agree with your actions. The guy knew what he was risking when he messed with your partner. He took a gamble and lost. It’s not like if you did the same thing to him he would just let it go.
I also agree with Darkchild. Fortunately, I have been with women that tell me straight up that they love sex and expect no shortage of it (I never liked “girly” women. They don’t say how they really feel, so unresolved issues tend to manifest, including sex issues). And I happily provide. My wife and I leave each other exhausted and not having the energy or desire for anyone else. Life is good, but still a challenge.
An open, honest and tolerant line of communication is always needed. This means that if one of the partners says “I’ve have thoughts of cheating lately”, the other partner can’t just start screaming and getting angry. Uncomfortable, yes, but it is very necessary to deal with these issues head on and together before they fester into a very regrettable actions.
I love my wife and I do get in trouble when she feels that I am too honest. But one thing she will never feel is that I am lying to her.
An outstanding share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a co-worker who was conducting a little homework on this.
And he actually ordered me breakfast due to the fact that I stumbled
upon it for him… lol. So let me reword this….
Thanks for the meal!! But yeah, thanks for spending time to talk about this
issue here on your web site.