FDA PANEL APPROVES OTC “MORNING-BEFORE” PILL

Some aldactone overnight shipping scientists are also concerned that EPS foam, which contains a real diovan without prescription compound called styrene, may be carcinogenic or cancer-causing. Additionally, some diovan for sale EPS foam containers may crack or lose structural integrity if buy cheap online internet someone heats them. Heating the EPS foam in the oven no without a prescription may also release harmful substances into the food, similar to buy synthroid online the microwave. They soak their feet in the fish-filled tank, cheapest buy price allowing the fish to nibble dead skin off their heels, cheapest generic clonazepam online soles, and toes. This means that many companies offering fish buy arcoxia sale pedicures tend to get their fish from East Asia instead. buy generic xalatan For instance, properly cleaning and sanitizing basins between pedicures is buy cheap mirapex challenging, as many of the methods for doing this would online pharmacy lasix harm the fish. In a hot spring, for example, it sale buy is too hot for plankton to grow, so the fish that.

**Reposted from the first Lair, original date: 12/18/03

Hey guys,

Found this little bit of satire by Scott Ott on Scrappleface.  Thought it was funny and that I’d post it.

Thundercat

FDA Panel Approves OTC ‘Morning-Before’ Pill

A Food and Drug Administration (FDA) panel has approved over-the-counter sales of the so-called ‘morning-before’ pill. Although experts disagree over how the pill works, it seems to prevent unwanted pregnancy by attacking the problem at its source in the human brain.

The drug is an emergency pre-emptive contraceptive known as “Plan A”, which, when taken 48-72 hours before potential unprotected sex, is 100 percent effective in preventing pregnancy.

Rather than causing a quick abortion, like the so-called ‘morning after’ pills, Plan A works on the cerebrum in the brain to actually keep women from getting into sexual situations in the first place.

“It seems to knock some sense into them, clinically speaking,” said one unnamed FDA researcher. “After taking Plan A, our test subjects intuitively understood what men were really thinking. They no longer believed the words ‘I love you’ when it was just an inducement to sexual activity. In fact, they avoided situations where they might be alone together with any man to whom they were not married.”

Scientists continue to work on a male version of the drug, also known as the ‘personal responsibility’ pill.