1) Women become easy to get so getting them isn´t any fun anymore? I disagree. I´ve been full circle when it comes to game: first I got whatever I could get (the settle for everything phase), as I learned how to meet women I met as many of em as possible (the playboy phase), got bored so went for depth instead of width (the relationship phase = attracting one woman for years instead of several just long enough to have sex). And it´s a circle, because once I knew how to do all that? I repeated it all for exactly my type of woman (and Im really, really picky), then for threesomes, then for exotics (only getting twins, only getting women who don´t speak a word of my language, etc.). So in short: it never gets bored if you always seek the next challenge, because anything the midn can conceive it can believe and achieve.

2) The Western socially accepted ideal can be traced down to what your friend said indeed, but since when do you have to follow the herd? There are alternatives roads in life, but you can only follow them if you STOP attaching value to traditional `status enriching activities`. To simplify it for ya: I work, but I attach no value at all to my job. I only work there because it´s the perfect opportunity to improve my phone game, to meet people from all over the world, and to meet new women on a consistent basis (3000 people work in my building). All I attach value to are enriching activities, so that´s minus the status. Travel, challenges, following the passions I have, meeting whomever crosses my path, making friends with people who interest me, etc.

You say that if one removes all the material goals from one´s life, one´s life becomes useless? Because it is in immaterial goals that we find fulfillment in life.

3) Dude, I HAVE combined the two: Ive been in a relationship for more than 2 years now, been in the game for 5… and is VERY doable because I have a different perspective on things. I seek challenge remember? So what´s more challenging: attracting someone and keep them feeling attracted to you for years and years, or for several hours/days until you sleep with them?

I think you know the answer. I also don´t call it settling if you´re with a woman who is exactly your type and keeps on challenging you as you challenge her… hell, I´ve learned the most about the game by being in relationships, and not during my playboy phase!

To more dating success,

Dennis Miedema
Win With Women

I have only been into this for 3 days, today I got my first email-close with a chick I knew for 2 years or something and never got beyond the friend who she is uncomfortable with.
Today, I got her email written by her own hands, she was quite confused, it was easy, probably because I already went through much personal-growth shit during the last 2 years and studied some psychology, so I have no anxiety and quite confident socially, no problems in approaching strangers, I didn’t know the first thing about men-women relationships and now I do, after I field-tested a few techniques and it looks like it works for real! even more than I hoped possible. (currently following AFC Adam methods, Juggler methods also sound interesting)

However, I’ve been thinking a lot yesterday and still thinking, to the point that I can’t sleep anymore…

Becoming a PUA has drawbacks, serious ones based on my analysis, no one seems to touch on that subject or maybe I haven’t found anything about it yet, currently I got these three:

1. Because women become so easy to get, they no longer take effort and thus you won’t really enjoy them much (from AFC Adam book, people are into things that take effort).

2. A friend of mine in a moment of frustration said: “Everything men do is only done to make their chances of having sex better”, which included in (his opinion): studying, working, and pretty much any kind of ambition, his analysis don’t sound so far from the truth.
So, PUAs don’t need those things anymore, there life is no more a struggle to have sex, later on when they are older, they might not see any value in living life anymore… (Mystery in Style’s book for an example).

3. For an experienced PUA, Marriage and normal (boring) love life is no longer interesting, for me that’s the biggest issue, I want to be a stupid husband who takes the trash out, I want to raise children, sadly it seems to me becoming a PUA will take that desire and ability away,…
Can someone somehow combine the two? being a PUA for fun and kicks, and reverting to normal-boring-man mode when he is ready to settle down, doesn’t seem to be possible from my 3 days of reading because the change in mindset is massive, from a geek to a PUA.

Comments?

(This should have better been a forum post somewhere, but all I could find is this website, and it doesn’t seem to have a forum.)

I am new to this but I think you’re right about Freud’s findings. Often negative experience will correlate something similar in future and produce the same emotions of fear.

I really need to conquer this. The other day was funny – I was at a bar and a chick walked in, I was just going to talk to her like I do some other chicks (just have problems taking it from there) and guess what?

I counted out the 3 seconds in my head and I actually felt “it”, the atmosphere in my head, change after 3 seconds. No doubt there is something to this 3 second rule and I might use it to beat my approach anxiety.

cheers for the tips.

SedProd

I love what you said here, though. Thanks for sharing.